After quitting the cabinet last week over the state of Brexit, Boris Johnson made his resignation speech to parliament today. Here is a transcript of what he said: "Hello, grubbledy mugwumps. I am fed up with our higgledy-arsed approach to Brexit,...
i Daily watch the Great White Id Huffing and puffing away. He’ll gladly tell you what he did To madly disrupt your day. He tweets his Id thoughts from his Throne— His petty gripes and “So unfairs!” Civility he now bemoans And offers us instead despair. His Little Ids feed off his spew And swallow every lie he tweets. His policies the poor now screws— (The same who sport their cle...
Straw-haired buffoon Boris Johnson has resigned from his job as UK Foreign Secretary, in protest at Brexit plans that he believes are "not outy enough". He bragged that although he achieved "bugger all" during his two years in the high-profile gov...
Boris Johnson aged 54 and 1/2, despite all common sense, has somehow risen to become Foreign Secretary in Her Majesty's Government under the premiership of Theresa May and today faces questions from readers of The Spoof. What is this Brexit thingy all about? (A. Leaver, Sunderland) To tell the truth, I haven't a clue. I had a bet with George Osborne as to who could do the most damage to the Br...
FA blazers announced today that the 2018-19 Premier League season would be cut short and would end on 29th March 2019 when the United Kingdom leaves the European Union. This is the result of those football fans who voted en masse to leave the Euro...
Scientists analysing huge, ancient bones, found on a Brit beach, have discovered something quite amazing! It seems the DNA in the bones, that belonged to a huge Jurassic sea monster, has the same DNA as the present UK foreign minister, BOJO! "Ther...
Back and to the Left news and Boris Johnson have something in common. Both of us like to make up wildly inaccurate stories to discredit or embarrass others. However where we are a pair of idiots travelling around the country singing stupid songs he i...
A secret cabinet office memorandum has been obtained by political editor Paxton Quigley, which admits that under European Union procurement rules the contract for printing new sterling banknotes will be awarded to the Polish national bank. Paxton...
Labour party members are secretly preparing for power after “Prime Minister” Theresa May refused at the weekend to back her Foreign Secretary’s continuing claim that there will be a “Brexit Dividend”. The continued and ever increasing claims eman...
Mr. Johnson’s Easter Speech and his reference to Dostoevsky has drawn considerable interest in Lower Bowel 4A Division, Continental Hades. (Wikipedia explains that "Lower Bowel" was originally "Lower Bower" and somehow changed over the course of t...
Press Secretary of the Russian Foreign Ministry Maria Zakharova has had her challenge to UK’s Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson accepted. Mr. Johnson and Ms. Zakharova went at it just last evening inside an ICC auditorium, standing room only. In...
Political blowhard, part time Foreign Secretary and full time hard boiled twat Boris Johnson has claimed that “Russia has stockpiles of chemical weapons”. After a steady belch he said: “We’ve got evidence, that I of course can’t disclose here beca...
After browsing through the UK headlines looking for a bit of stupidity to have a laugh about, mega-spoofer, Jaggedone, came across these two gems in one "superstar" tabloid printed next to each other on the same page telling confused, mesmerized Brit...
Minister for Malapropism and head clown Boris Johnson made a controversial speech today, in which he claimed that the success or failure of Brexit had nothing to do with his government's negotiations with the EU. Instead, he said, it rested entirely...
Today in Brussels, Boris Johnson made a long-awaited speech to the EU, setting out the terms of Brexit as he sees them. Here is the full unabridged text of his speech. "Good afterlunch, my fellow Euro-chumps and bureaucratinators. It has been eigh...
Foreign Secretary, Boris Johnson, has blasted Virgin Railways for banning the Daily Mail. Or as we at Back and to the Left news refer to it as "A Rag for people who love racism to have a wank over". Boris, who looked like he'd been drinking but he a...
The British foreign secretary, conservative chief buffoon and renowned general clown, called BOJO (for the editor's sake) has decided to turn his attention to real, black British humor, instead of acting like a diplomat, politician (well they're a bu...
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