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Funny satire stories about Football (Soccer)

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Funny story: Rooney To Join City In Shock Swap Deal For Tevez

Rooney To Join City In Shock Swap Deal For Tevez

Unsettled 'want out' spoilt brat Manchester United striker Wayne Rooney looks all set to join Manchester City in a straight swap deal for Carlos Tevez, according to our source, Nutty Norman from Ardwick Green. Speaking from a theme pub in town, Nu...

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Funny story: Rooney Won't Sign New Deal - Can't Write Own Name

Rooney Won't Sign New Deal - Can't Write Own Name

Wayne Rooney looks set to leave Manchester United because he will not, or cannot, sign a new deal at the club. The England striker is not thought to be interested in a move away from Old Trafford, but is understood to be physically unable to write...

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Funny story: "The Chosen One" only wants Rooney if he learns proper English, mate!

"The Chosen One" only wants Rooney if he learns proper English, mate!

Jose Mourinho "The Chosen One" has shown interest in unsettled, once upon a time Superstar, Wayne Rooney. His club Real Madrid will do anything what Mourinho requests and have no problems offering Wayne a job at Real Madrid. There are though se...

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Funny story: Wayne Rooney Signs New Contract

Wayne Rooney Signs New Contract

In one of the biggest about-turns in recent footballing memory, Manchester United and England striker Wayne Rooney has today signed a new three-year contract agreement. Rooney, 24, went with his wife Coleen to his local branch of Currys and purcha...

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Funny story: Rooney To Stay At United - But He Will Be Farmed Out In Loan Deal

Rooney To Stay At United - But He Will Be Farmed Out In Loan Deal

According to inside news leaked from Lou Macari's chippy, under fire United striker Wayne Rooney will be staying at Manchester United, but will be farmed out by the club on a twelve month loan deal until the dust settles. Most probably to Tranmere...

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Funny story: Rangers CEO Bain - Battle lost but war still on

Rangers CEO Bain - Battle lost but war still on

Angry Rangers supremo Martin Bain last night vowed to fight the proposed Government spending cuts as he prepared to go to war with the SFA. The raging chief executive is angry that the Ark Royal is to be scrapped as he planned to launch strategic...

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Funny story: Wayne: I want Chelsea.

Wayne: I want Chelsea.

Rooney officially has come out and said that he wants to quit Manchester United. The overpaid and over-laid Manchester United forward, and former Blueboy, told his boss that he wants to go to "Chelsea". But not to the club. Yes, it's 24 year...

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Funny story: Yakubu enjoys mountain trek

Yakubu enjoys mountain trek

He's getting back to full fitness ladies and gentlemen. At Liverpool he practically jogged for two minutes straight. But now, Yakubu proudly boasted how he is "fitter than ever". In a team building exercise during mid-week, Davey Moyes invited his...

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Funny story: One a Blue, Always a [insert team colour here]. Rooney's on the Run

One a Blue, Always a [insert team colour here]. Rooney's on the Run

It seems his tenure at Old Trafford is finally coming to an end. Following allegations that he had chatted to another woman via Facebook the other night, Sir Alex Ferguson commented how "he'd had his last chance. He's still up to his old ways and...

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Funny story: Manchester United F.C. ... What a Shambles

Manchester United F.C. ... What a Shambles

Real Madrid have today confirmed a deal to bring Manchester United's bright young Mexican striker Hernandez to the Bernabeu in July 2012 if, as expected, he becomes a world class striker. Little Pea President Florentino Perez met last week wi...

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Funny story: Rooney To Join Ronaldo At Real?

Rooney To Join Ronaldo At Real?

Despite continued denials from Manchester United officials to the contrary, the smart money down Sir Matt Busby Way seems to be on baldy Scouse striker Wayne Rooney departing to Real Madrid in the January transfer window. Insiders say that Sir Ale...

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Funny story: Blackburn and Sunderland in Bore Score Draw. Surprised?

Blackburn and Sunderland in Bore Score Draw. Surprised?

There were 22 players on the pitch. And not one of them made an impact. In a game which has always brought plenty of excitement, Blackburn and Sunderland were about as effective as the Germans during trench warfare in World War One: effectively...

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Funny story: Inter to sign Messi?!

Inter to sign Messi?!

The president of Inter Milan has confirmed that he wants to sign Lionel Messi. Mourinho commented on this and said: "Signing Messi from Barça is like getting me smilling and looking happy. It is also like making Liverpool win a match against Derb...

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Funny story: Javier Hernandez gets football speed limit

Javier Hernandez gets football speed limit

The English Football Association (F.A) officially announced that Javier 'Chicharito' Hernandez will get football speed limit. This means that he can no longer run 1,000,000,000,000 mph but only 23 mph, which is Usain Bolt's speed. During his chil...

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Funny story: Rooney to leave Manchester United

Rooney to leave Manchester United

Wayne Rooney has confirmed he is to leave Manchester United next summer. In an exclusive interview he said: 'My heart lies elsewhere and so it's not fair on the fans.' Rooney was once a world number one however of late his talents have fallen shor...

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Funny story: John W Henry To Sell Liverpool FC Insists Insider

John W Henry To Sell Liverpool FC Insists Insider

Reports coming in suggest that Boston Red Sox owner John W Henry is to sell his controlling stake in Liverpool Football Club, and is reportedly extremely irate that he appears to have been suckered and sold a dud. Henry, who was at Goodison Park o...

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Funny story: Tom Hicks: "...an organised conspiracy over many months...", Liverpool "...was swindled away from me in an epic swindle."

Tom Hicks: "...an organised conspiracy over many months...", Liverpool "...was swindled away from me in an epic swindle."

This was ANFIELD: Devastated Tom Hicks, the former Liverpool FC co-owner, who has been the victim of a 'conspiracy', has warned that the already protracted saga is not over and voiced his anger at the manner with which he lost control of the club, c...

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