Written by Chrissy Benson

Thursday, 29 March 2018

image for Pope Francis Spotted at International Atheist Convention
"I have seen the light," said Pope Francis. "There is no God."

Last weekend came a huge blow to people of faith when Pope Francis was spotted at the International Atheist Convention in Stockholm, Sweden. When questioned about his attendance at the conference, Pope Francis stated that he was there not as a protester, but as a participant.

“I have seen the light," avowed the pope. "There is no God.”

Pope Francis went on to state that he does not judge those who feel the need for an imaginary God friend – so long as that imaginary deity is a loving one.

“I find it distasteful when the devout use God as an excuse for exclusion and hatred,” the pope explained. “Since there is no actual God, if people decide to conjure up some sort of deity, they at least ought to make it a benevolent one.”

While some have asserted that he should step down as pope in light of his newfound skepticism, Pope Francis only scoffed. “That's like saying I should step down because I believe in global warming and climate change. What blasphemy could there be in acknowledging the truth?"

In momentary lapse back into theism, the pope added, “Besides, God created me with a brain for a reason. How could it be a sin for me to use it?”

The pope did note that despite his lack of belief in God, he remains a big fan of Jesus Christ, the person. "I am not going to put him on some sort of pedestal and worship him, of course. But he was a good man."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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