Controversy Over Photo of Pope John Paul II
VATICAN ((AP) As hundreds of mourners walked past Pope John Paul II's body which was laying in state in the frescoed Apostolic Palace, many hushed whispers broke out as the people got close to the body. The mourners generally remained respectful...
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Pope Francis to Allow Masturbation, But Only Among Priests and Only with Biblically-themed Porn
THE VATICAN—Pope Francis, in his new encyclical Masturbationes Licit, has now opened the practice of masturbation to some, but not all, Catholics. Said Pope Francis, “Given that our esteemed clergy appear to have—how do you say?—too much unrequited...
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Vatican Details Plans for Pope's Burial
Vatican City - Vatican official today provided detailed plans for the burial of Pope John Paul II. One detail that is sure to anger some longtime Pope-watchers is the plan to bury Pope John Paul in the grave used by Pope John the XXIII.
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McDonalds Purchases the Papacy, Ronald Made McPope
McDonalds Corporation has officially announced today its successful hostile takeover of the Roman Catholic Church and affiliated organisations. McDonalds now has exclusive rights to the Pope and the Vatican, whilst...
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Pope Benedict Urges Muslims to Give Up Their Oil to Christian Corporations Like Exxon Mobil
COLOGNE, Germany (Reuters)-On Saturday, Pope Benedict XVI delivered a blunt message that Islam must give up its oil to America and Christian-Republican oil companies like Exxon Mobil. He said an improvement in relations with Islam "is a vital nece...
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Vatican Displays Bones of Jesus Christ While 'Da Vinci Code' Rakes in $224 Million
THE VATICAN (UPI)--Reacting angrily to the $224 million gross worldwide opening of the "The Da Vinci Code" movie, Pope Benedict XVI dismissed its plot of a Catholic cover-up by publicly displaying the bones of Jesus Christ, which he said had been sto...
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Papal Conclave elects new Pope, debuts Papal Paypal initiative
Pope Requests Vatican Cafeteria Add Pudding
Vatican First Lady demands Obama-style armored limo
Hillary Clinton to run for Pope
The Pope Says That Donald Trump Is Positively Going To Go To Hell
Big Papa's Holy Roman Catholic Church's Vestment Buried at Yankee Stadium
'Is The Pope Catholic?' No, says Republican Congressman
Secret Recording of Pope's Conversation Released
The 2000 Year Catholic Reich
Third world countries upset at Vatican Cardinal's description of UK as "a Third World country". Threaten to burn Freemasons Bible
Pope Blesses Bush, Pentagon, Israel, the Church
Wiccans send letter to Pope asking for holiday back.
Trump may run for Pope next
Presidential hopeful Donald Trump has said that after leading the US he would like to be Pope next. "I'd be a great Pope," the orange pussy-grabber stated. "I'd run the Vatican like a business. And we'd let women in. Really nice women." Politic...
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Pope Benedict Converts to Islam
VATICAN CITY -- Pope Benedict's speech last week, which the Muslim world took to condemn Islam for violence, set off a whole series of riots, church burnings and the murder of a nun. The Pope, following multiple failed apologies for his words, a...
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Pope Authorizes Social Distance Baptisms Using Water Pistols
"Over our 2,000-year history, the Church has always adjusted," said Pope Francis, as he announced a major change in baptisms rituals and canonical law to reflect the coronavirus situation. According to the New Testament, Jesus of Nazareth was submer...
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Meteor vs. Pope: How God says he hates you
The Pope, who still denies that evolution created the Earth and not some punk-ass god who calls himself Jehovah or Yahweh or Shecky the Animated Ground Beef, has been struck by a meteor! Oh sure, you might think this is a piece of post-modern scul…
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Trey Parker And Matt Stone Quit South Park Over Offensive Episode
Trey Parker and Matt Stone have confirmed they are to leave South Park - the controversial cartoon series they created, write and star in - after objecting to the "gratuitously sick, twisted" way a recent episode depicted the Pope and Roman...
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Catholic Church to Allow Fellatio; Cunnilingus
In a dramatic reversal from previous Papal policies, Pope Benedict XVI announced today that the Catholic Church will allow men to receive fellatio and women to enjoy cunnilingus. However, certain restrictions will apply to both acts. The Pope's d...
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George W. Bush Gives Thanks As Deaths Of Schiavo and Pope Deflect Attention From USA's Decline
President George W. Bush attended mass on the day that Roman Catholic Pope John Paul II died and quietly gave thanks to God that that the death of the Pontiff and the controversy surrounding the death of Terri Schiavo has served to deflect the Americ...
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Pope John Paul's Latest Book Is a Shocking Tell-All
VATICAN CITY - Described as Joan Rivers meets Howard Stern's Private Parts, Pope John Paul II's latest book, Is the Pope Catholic?, is a rollicking tell-all that contains startling revelations about the world leaders and celebrities the...
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Pope Francis on Sin and Penance.
VATICAN CITY PAPAL ANNOUNCEMENT. The following was broadcast last night by Pope Francis from Rome. "The Holy See's concern with the march of materialism has prompted her to reinstate PENANCE as the primary mode of the expiation of sins. For too long we have ignored the sacrament and its healing power. The global obsession with transient pleasures, with material things, with cosmetics, travel...
Read full storyFunny Pope Headlines
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McDonalds Purchases the Papacy, Ronald Made McPope
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George W. Bush Gives Thanks As Deaths Of Schiavo and Pope Deflect Attention From USA's Decline
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Vatican Details Plans for Pope's Burial
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Vatican Displays Bones of Jesus Christ While 'Da Vinci Code' Rakes in $224 Million
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Catholic Church to Allow Fellatio; Cunnilingus
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Pope Says "Yes" to Gay Marriages
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Pope Francis on Sin and Penance.
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Trump may run for Pope next
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Pope Francis to Allow Masturbation, But Only Among Priests and Only with Biblically-themed Porn
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Pope Authorizes Social Distance Baptisms Using Water Pistols
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Pope slams Windows - calls it "diabolical" - dubs Bill Gates "spawn of Satan"
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Pope John Paul's Latest Book Is a Shocking Tell-All
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Controversy Over Photo of Pope John Paul II
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Pope Benedict Urges Muslims to Give Up Their Oil to Christian Corporations Like Exxon Mobil
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Trey Parker And Matt Stone Quit South Park Over Offensive Episode
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Pope Benedict Converts to Islam
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Blair Meets Pope to Beg Forgiveness
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Paris Hilton and Pope Benedict expecting a baby
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Pope Has AIDS
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Meteor vs. Pope: How God says he hates you
