Christmas always provides us with miserable and wonderful stories, and this story has hit the hearts of donkey and Jesus lovers in the UK!
A donkey, that appeared from nowhere tied up on a supermarket forecourt was on its last legs until a donkey lover found it and rescued it from its deadly ordeal.
She asked a donkey whisperer to pop over to her "Donkey preservation Sanctuary" because it seems that this particular donkey had a special story to tell the world. So after a conversation with 'Alan' (that's his name and I did not make it up!), in donkey language, i.E. Hee Haw, hee haw, etc, etc. The whisperer divulged to the usual culprits, The Daily Garbage (meaning all UK tabloids), Alan's fabulous Christmas resurrection story!
Alan the donkey, claims he was the one that Jesus rode on whilst entering Jerusalem on Palm Sunday a long, long time ago, and has been sent back to earth at Christmas time to warn the world of Satan, disguised as Humpty Dumpty, who sat on a wall, but never built one, shook the walls of Jericho, and has promised to destroy the world if sensible human beings keep calling him a demented butthole!
This donkey's Christmas tail (yes I know, but it's fake anyway) is much more important to humankind than the Bible, Koran, and other religious epics, including Erskine Quint, but that's a different story!
Religious fanatics are flocking to the donkey sanctuary in Lincolnshire hoping to make Alan a saint! The Pope has had a heart attack because Alan's appearance on the planet proves that his Catholic church are a bunch of impostors, and Jesus prefers to speak through a donkey rather than his mob!