Boris Johnson: "I'm the perfect James Bond"

Funny story written by Jim Skinz

Monday, 2 August 2021

image for Boris Johnson: "I'm the perfect James Bond"
Bojo as Bond? Stranger things have happened

Knowing his time as UK prime minister is drawing to a close, Boris Johnson has set his sights on another role: 007.

The premier says he is an ideal James Bond, with all of his boozing and sleeping around.

"Who's going to replace Daniel Craig? Why, me, of course," he told reporters during a hastily arranged press conference in a skip just off the A41.

"I've got it all: confidence, style, a deadly touch and ridiculous hair."

A spokesman for the Bond franchise declined to say whether they would consider Johnson for the 007 role, but did admit he once auditioned to play Ernst Stavro Blofeld because of his sociopathic qualities and hair.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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