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Funny satire stories about James Bond

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Funny story: James Bond is a terrorist, but Pussy is galore

James Bond is a terrorist, but Pussy is galore

Some Americans are calling for the CIA to be dismantled, calling it America’s “domestic terrorist organization:” since the CIA often engages in terroristic methods, like blowing stuff up, killing democratically-elected leaders and setting up fascist…

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Funny story: King Charles Plans Dance Routine STAYIN' ALIVE By Bee Gees At Coronation

King Charles Plans Dance Routine STAYIN' ALIVE By Bee Gees At Coronation

Inspired by the dancing on YouTube, King Charles decided to include a Bee Gees' STAYIN' ALIVE dance routine during or perhaps right after his coronation while moving down the aisle out of Westminster Abby. After reviving her with smelling salts,…

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Funny story: British Sexpots Cheryl Cole and Elizabeth Hurley To Star In The New James Bond Movie, "James Bond And His Sizzling Sex Romp With Two Sexy Russian Spies"

British Sexpots Cheryl Cole and Elizabeth Hurley To Star In The New James Bond Movie, "James Bond And His Sizzling Sex Romp With Two Sexy Russian Spies"

LONDON - (UK Satire) - Bees Knees News reporter Ginger Beer, recently met with Elizabeth Hurley and Cheryl Cole at the ritzy Restaurant Gordon Ramsay. The two British women will soon be appearing in the latest James Bond motion picture titled, "Ja…

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Funny story: The Sexy, Big Arsed Kim Kardashian To Film A James Bond Movie In The United Kingdom

The Sexy, Big Arsed Kim Kardashian To Film A James Bond Movie In The United Kingdom

LIVERPOOL, England - (Satire News) - The Tickety Boo News Agency has just announced that the eldest of the five very popular, and very big-butted Kardashian sisters will be filming the next James Bond motion picture in and around Liverpool. Kimmy,…

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Funny story: Hollywood Is Courting Aaron Rodgers To Be The Next James Bond

Hollywood Is Courting Aaron Rodgers To Be The Next James Bond

HOLLYWOOD - (Sports Satire) - Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers is thrilled that Tinsel Town is looking at him to replace Daniel Craig, as the new James Bond, agent 007. Rodgers, the ex-boyfriend of NASCAR sweetheart Danica Patrick, say…

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Funny story: How To Resurrect Daniel Craig As James Bond And Judi Dench As M

How To Resurrect Daniel Craig As James Bond And Judi Dench As M

Easy. The new film is an old James Bond case, protected under the Official Secrets Act and supervised by Judi Dench as M before Javier Barden killed her in the Skyfall film. Everything works on celluloid. Pay film director Ridley Scott loads…

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Funny story: Jai Courtney front runner to be new Bond

Jai Courtney front runner to be new Bond

Following the release of ‘No Time to Die’, Daniel Craig’s last outing as 007, the Internet has been awash with speculation over which actor will take over the iconic role. Will filmmakers break with tradition and cast a person of colour such as I…

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Funny story: Did Anyone See Prince William In That Dark Green Velvet Blazer?

Did Anyone See Prince William In That Dark Green Velvet Blazer?

See Prince William in that dark green velvet blazer? Wow! Talk about the next James Bond toss-up, Prince William, would be a shoo-in if not for other responsibilities like future King of England. However, that dark green velvet blazer with the na…

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Funny story: Daniel Craig and Scarlett Johansson Will Co-Star in The Sequel to “Live and Let Die” Titled “Lie and Let Live”

Daniel Craig and Scarlett Johansson Will Co-Star in The Sequel to “Live and Let Die” Titled “Lie and Let Live”

HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – Silver Screen Showcase Magazine reports that Daniel Craig (aka James Bond) has announced that he will do one more movie in the James Bond franchise. Craig told SSSM’s Pomona Vox that he could not pass up the opportunity…

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Funny story: The New James Bond Film “No Time To Die” Flops In The “Fly Over” States

The New James Bond Film “No Time To Die” Flops In The “Fly Over” States

NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – The Scuttlebutt Review reports that the latest James Bond film "No Time To Die," starring Daniel Craig, was a big dud in Iowa, Nebraska, and Kansas, known collectively as the “Fly Over” states. SR reporter Dan “The…

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Funny story: Kate, Duchess Of Cambridge Slated To Be Next Bond Girl

Kate, Duchess Of Cambridge Slated To Be Next Bond Girl

WOW! Kate Middleton, the Duchess of Cambridge, mother of three and wife of a future king of England, has been offered and accepted the role of the next Bond girl in the next Bond film. So wow for her! Reading about the announcement, Prince Harr…

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Funny story: Daniel Craig In One More Bond Film: There IS TOO Time To Die

Daniel Craig In One More Bond Film: There IS TOO Time To Die

For a private island in the Caribbean, his corporate jet with a landing strip at Heathrow, and the uncontested seat in Parliament, Daniel Craig has reluctantly decided to do one more James Bond film, much to the relief of his many fans and the bank o…

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Funny story: It's just a bloke being a bit moody isn't it? by Raymond Ving

It's just a bloke being a bit moody isn't it? by Raymond Ving

Hello - How is everyone? Raymond Ving here again. You might remember me from such columns as Aubergines, there a bit aren't they? Or Custard? what's that all about. Here I am delivering my opinion on the latest Bond movie. Now, in the interest…

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Funny story: Boris Johnson: "I'm the perfect James Bond"

Boris Johnson: "I'm the perfect James Bond"

Knowing his time as UK prime minister is drawing to a close, Boris Johnson has set his sights on another role: 007. The premier says he is an ideal James Bond, with all of his boozing and sleeping around. "Who's going to replace Daniel Craig? W…

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Funny story: Next James Bond Could Be Mixed-Race Transgenderist With One Leg And A Lisp

Next James Bond Could Be Mixed-Race Transgenderist With One Leg And A Lisp

After the stunning news, this week, that the new James Bond is both black and female in the form of Lashana Lynch, it's been revealed that producers are already looking to the future, and will break down even more boundaries next time around. Havi…

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Funny story: Obituary: Sean Connery Discovers You Only Live Once

Obituary: Sean Connery Discovers You Only Live Once

Sean Connery, the actor who died at the weekend, having had a long and successful career 'tramping the boards' - not least in the James Bond movies - has finally found that, contrary to popular belief, you only live once. Connery died on Saturday,…

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Funny story: Sean Connery James Bond Comeback Shelved

Sean Connery James Bond Comeback Shelved

There was a major disappointment for James Bond fans at the weekend, when the proposed comeback of Sean Connery as 007 had to be abandoned when the actor gave up his ghost. Connery, 90, had starred in Bond adventures since he was a small boy, and,…

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