Merry Christmas With Six Wishes Answered In 2022
Top of the list, since 2020, the annual (soon like the 4th of July) wish to come true is Trump’s 2020 presidential election loss. Amen. Alleluia! Thank you, God! Trump’s failure is like the gift he keeps giving to the U.S. and the world. Trump’s…
Read full storyRNC Chairwoman Ronna McDaniel Tells Trump To Go Away - He's Boring As Shit!
CHICAGO - (Satire News) - Republican National chairwoman Ronna McDaniel, has made it abundantly clear that she and all of the members of the GOP have moved on from Trump the loser (aka Trump the Twice Impeached) and now want him to simply go the fuck…
Read full storyQueen Elizabeth Left The Gold In Her Teeth To Her Adopted Ukrainian Step-Son
LONDON - (Satire News) - King Charles III, has just informed the British press that his dear, late mum, bequeathed the gold in her teeth to her step-son, Billiando Chekchov Windsor. Charlie, as the queen called him, said that "Billy" was so overjo…
Read full storyThe Five Kardashian Sisters Are Very Concerned About The Nation's Tampon Shortage
HIDDEN HILLS, California - (Satire News) - Tabloid Today's Papaya Bamboo says that the Kardashian sisters are extremely upset about the tampon shortage that has just hit the nation. Miss Bamboo said that Kim, who was recently dumped by her boyfrie…
Read full storyHerschel Is Surfin’ the Red Wave
Herschel Walker has achieved so much in his life. He says he was a cop and he was in the military and trained with the FBI, and of course we all know by now he threatened to kill his wife by putting a gun to her head. Every one of his family membe…
Read full storyNeanderthals, 70,000 Years ago, Were the First Chefs - Ate Meat and also Veggie Burgers
Neanderthals are our close cousins. I saw a fascinating article about Neanderthal cooking and looked it up on Google. Imagine yourself back 70, 000 years ago living with others in a huge cave in Iraq. There is a Julia Child type older Neand…
Read full story2077: The Year America Died on the Toilet, Just Like Elvis!
The Nazis are out in full force! Some guy at a Washington airport spews “Heil Hitler”, and Trump invites Nick Fuentes and Kanye West to Mar, and says he has no idea who David Duke is, but he’ll take the KKK’s money. That’s true capitalism. Does…
Read full storyRussia Reports That The RAF Fighter Jet Pilot Who Was Shot Down Over Ukraine Is Now In Prison
MOSCOW - (Satire News) - Russian authorities report that UK pilot Capt. Winthrop D. Greengate, who was shot down near the town of Losova, Ukraine, is now being held in an undisclosed prison in the USSR. Capt. Greengate says that he feels somewhat…
Read full storyRussian President Vladimir Nikita Putin Is Secretly Planning To Invade Cambodia
MOSCOW, Russia - (Satire News) - The Kremlin Voice reports that a secret document has been found in which President Vladimir Nikita Putin is planning on invading Cambodia within the near future. Putski, as VP Kamala Harris calls him, revealed that…
Read full storyScotland Yard Reports That The World War II Luftwaffe Bomber Bomb That Was Found In The Basement of Buckingham Palace Has Been Stolen
LONDON - (Satire News) - In a strange turn of events, the WWII Luftwaffe bomber bomb that was found in the Buckingham Palace basement has been stolen. A representative for Scotland Yard said that they are checking surveillance video to see if they…
Read full storyA United Kingdom Rugby Player Is Caught In Portugal With 30 Pounds of Marijuana In His Tesla Truck
EL GUAPO, PORTUGAL - (Satire News) - A player who plays for The Wanking Warriors of The English Premiership Rugby Union was caught with 30 pounds of refined Swiss marijuana in a suitcase in his Tesla truck. The player identified as Rolf P. Gladsto…
Read full storyMeghan Markle Tells Anderson Cooper That Her Sister-In-Law Kate Middleton Is A Brit Bitch
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - In the world of "Sisters-In-Law" there is no fucking love lost between the wife of Prince Harry (Meghan Markle) and the wife of Prince William (Kate Middleton). Both gals hate each other as much as VP Kamala Harris…
Read full storyLionel Messi and The Entire Argentinian World Cup Team Get Beat By Saudi Arabia In The Biggest Upset In World Cup History
QATAR - (World Cup Sports News) - The Argentinian soccer team, which along with Brazil is favored to win the World Cup Finals, has just been a part of the greatest upset in the history of soccer or football as they refer to it in the United Kingdom.
Read full storyKing Charles III, Reveals His Favorite UK Hip Hop Band
LONDON - (Satire News) - Buckingham Palace spokesperson Nigel Foote, has just informed the BBC the name of King Charles III's favorite hip hop British band. Foote said that since becoming king, Charles has attended two concerts by the rap band nam…
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