Chinese government deny any problems in Hong Kong
The Chinese government have made an official statement to declare that nothing is happening in Hong Kong. The short written statement simply said "Hong Kong velly calm. The peopre are so happy to be a part of China." A spokesman agreed to speak to...
Read full storyOwen Wilson Celebrity Horoscope
Born today, you are the sort who doesn't get your nose out of joint easily. You are cheerfully willing to accept whatever life sends your way, whether it's an also-ran finish in the sexiest-person-in-the-office contest or an also-ran finish to Matthe...
Read full storyPizza Express CCTV Security Tapes Have Been Stolen
CCTV security tapes containing footage which could have proved crucial in ascertaining whether or not Prince Andrew visited the Woking branch of Pizza Express on 10 March 2001, have been stolen, says the shop's manager. The Prince faces accusation...
Read full storyPositive Thinking Found to Be Totally Awesome in All Respects
A recent study conducted by the Sunshine Centre has revealed positive thinking to be totally awesome in all respects. "This is true feel-good news," said Sunshine Centre Director, Cassie Hayes. "We found that, whatever the situation - I don't like...
Read full storyWeighted-Blanket Death Syndrome on the Rise
WEST CHESTER--A seventy-five-year-old woman, whose name was being withheld at press time, was found dead in her apartment yesterday afternoon, trapped by the weighted blanket under which she had been pinned for some time. Neighbors, who had not seen...
Read full storyWhitechapel woman battered husband with TV stand to 'limber up' for Black Friday
A 23-year-old woman from Whitechapel in East London told a court that she beat her husband with a television stand to get some practice for the hurly-burly, Black Friday melee in 11 days time. Tracy Dell of Vallance Road, fractured the skull of he...
Read full storyPizza Express In Woking Have Never Heard Of Prince Andrew
The manager of the Woking branch of Pizza Express, where Prince Andrew says he spent time with his daughter Beatrice on the day American woman Virginia Roberts claims he was raping her, has said he has never heard of the Royal. Branch manager, Gil...
Read full storyQueen Says She Doesn't Believe Prince Andrew Did It
Her Majesty the Queen has said that she doesn't believe for one minute that her grandson, Prince Andrew, could have been involved in any sexual activity with an underaged 17-year-old girl in 2001, when he was 41 years old, and is prepared to stake he...
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