Synod Takes Vote - It's Thumbs Down
Plebes, Prudes, and Pimps Take Plebescite WIRED STREET JOURNAL REPORTER: KR SCHWARTZ DATELINE: Washington D.C. January 24th, 2019 (a day that will live in infamy) In a paean to impotence, the United States Senate voted on two separate bil...
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1980's actor, Steve Guttenberg has revealed that he is feeling a little left out. The star of Cocoon, Three Men and a Little Baby, Three Men and a Little Girl, that one where he played a nosy neighbour, and that other one that starred that bloke that...
Read full storyDonald Trump has not licked a Cactus for 26 days now
In keeping with recent changes, the White House has revealed that Donald Trump has not licked a cactus for 26 days now. It is good news for green, spiky objects within the White House. Trump started licking the Cactus back in 2017, because Barack...
Read full storyLast adults in the room step forward to deal with Covington boys in MAGA hats
The facts are now in on the Covington boys in the MAGA hats on their trip to the Lincoln Memorial. The MAGA hat is now being studied as causing brainlock, wild eyes, hysterical convulsions, purblind news reports, plus endangering the country. T...
Read full storyFootball Gossip: Milner's PE Teacher, Aboubakar Kamara ABH, Beth Mead Under Offer, Vegan Riposte
Liverpool midfielder, James Milner, 33, was dismissed against Crystal Palace after picking up a second yellow card for a foul on Wilfried Zaha. It was later revealed that he had been sent off by his former PE teacher Jon Moss. Referee Moss was Milner...
Read full storyPresident Trump Delivers State Of The Union Address On Twitter
The annual US State of the Union address read by the president, has never been given later than 12 February, but after political analysts had earlier predicted that this year's speech may have been as late as Christmas, President Trump took matters i...
Read full storyTrump: Rookie Artist Paints Himself into a Wall
As the government shutdown enters its second month, President Donald Trump has a new hobby: painting. Observers are not exactly sure what kind of painting he's into, however, or what kind of material he paints with. Whatever he uses, he usually gets...
Read full storyDemocrats Ready To Talk About Wall Construction Dates
After months of ridiculing the idea of President Donald Trump's Mexican border wall, and refusing him the funds to pay for it, the Democrats have, today, softened their attitude somewhat, and now seem ready to talk about possible dates for its constr...
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