The Beatles In 'Comeback' Shock
There was amazing and exciting news for fans of The Beatles today when, in an impromptu press conference in Liverpool, Sir Paul McCartney proudly announced that the 'world's most influential band' is to make a comeback - with just him in it! Ther...
Read full storyDon't Call It Fake News
The press publishes the news. When Trump doesn’t like the news, he calls it fake news. He has recently graduated the term to, wait for it, the enemy of the people. Surely, Trump never heard of Ibsen, but the phrase sounds jingoistic, and so the guy w...
Read full storyYour Language Lesson of the Week
This week, the difference between 'continuously' and 'continually'. 'Continually' means occuring again and again, as in: "He irritated her continually day after day. She considered a divorce. Was it worth the time and effort to cultivate a relationship that seemed to be doomed to failure? She couldn't decide." 'Continuously' means occuring without a break, as in: "He irritated her continuou...
Read full storyIt's Back! The Monobrow Leaves Men Gasping for it and more...
Comely adult film star Felicity Fellatio admitted today that following rave reviews for her new look, she no longer resorted to electrolysis, plucking, shaving, creams or any form of depilation and claimed that men are loving it. Felicity spoke ex...
Read full storyHarry Maguire Turns Down Manchester United Move As He Fucking Hates Them
Harry Maguire, the Leicester City and England defender, has turned down the opportunity to join Manchester United, saying he fucking hates them. Maguire, 25, was born in Sheffield, and has always been a Sheffield United supporter. As such, there...
Read full storyExperts Confirm Kim Jong-Un Once Adorable Asian Baby
Earlier this morning, White House officials addressed the nation in a press conference and confirmed that Kim Jong-Un, leader of the most tyrannical government in the world, was once an adorable Asian baby. The shocking evidence disproves the commonl...
Read full storyDemi Lovato Conscious Again After Publicity Stunt
US singer Demi Lovato, who was reported as having been taken into hospital on Tuesday, after a 'Publicity Stunt Overdose' (PSO) is said to be 'recovering well', and is expected to be fleecing fans again soon. Lovato, 25, who was on the road with h...
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