Hatch Hatches Plan
Senior Utah Republican Senator Orrin Hatch spoke to NBC News correspondent Frank Thorp Wednesday, saying he would prefer for FBI confirmed domestic abusing White House Staff Secretary Rob Porter not to resign, but instead to just “work his way throug...
Read full storyTeresa May to Change her name
Following a series of arguments with naysayers, British Prime Minister Teresa May is set to change her name to Teresa Not On Your Nelly. Famously wishy-washy, and liable to go with the consensus, like Donald Trump, Teresa May has found herself in...
Read full storyValerie Thighborg claims Julian Assange has disappeared from the embassy
Last night former assistant prosecutor from Sweden, Ms. Valerie Thighborg, arrived in London to once again visit with Mr. Assange. This week Judge Arbuthnot ruled Mr. Assange’s legal situation must remain unchanged. No longer with the prosecuto...
Read full storyMan Shocked by number of repeats
Quentin Bedale Posh-Gob III has revealed, that like most of us, he is shocked by the number of repeats on Television. Quentin told us: 'There I was indoors, just polishing and cleaning my space-hopper, with oil all over the floor, when I suddenly...
Read full storySpace Hoppers to make a come-back
Following the reformation of both Banarama, and The Spice Girls, another out-dated relic from the youth of many of our loyal readers is set to make a comeback, with the relaunch of the humble Space Hopper. The re-inforced balloon with two handles,...
Read full storyTrump's Twitter Feed Gains Sentience
President Donald Trump's twitter feed has, according to those in the know in the scientific community has gained sentience, able to have its own thoughts, feelings and moods, as a separate entity to Trump. 'This changes everything' said Dr Chutney...
Read full storyMan who read all of Fire and Fury still suffering from headaches
Shane Whotsit, from Chutney on the Fritz who read all of Michael Wolff's despised political tome Fire and Fury - Inside Trump's White House for a bet. He still has headaches one month after finishing it. "Yes, I bet my cousin Nathan that I coul...
Read full storyMan who voted Brexit still disappointed
Nathan Whotsit, from Chutney on the Fritz has said that he only voted for Brexit, so it would mean that his wife of 15 years could not put them through the horror of Eurovision, ever again. 'Imagine my surprise' said the incredulous man 'when I re...
Read full storyTrump bankrolling mission to send Hillary to Mars on Falcon Heavy
In the wake of Elon Musk's successful test-launch of his Falcon Heavy rocket system, US president Donald Trump is said to masterminding a campaign to send Hillary Clinton to Mars. Inspired by Musk loading up a mannequin at the wheel of one of this...
Read full storyBrit 83 year-old lollipop man told to keep his sticky fingers to himself!
Lollipop men and women are fundamental for the safety of UK children crossing roads in front of their schools, but one lollipop man got his fingers stuck in the candy too far and was sacked! The gentleman, a popular figure outside school, loved hi...
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