Dalai Lama To Meet With Dr. Billingsgate In Official San Diego Visit
BILLINGSGATE POST - The Dalai Lama, who will make his first official visit to San Diego this week, is Tibet's spiritual leader, that nation's political leader in exile and the 1989 Nobel Peace Prize recipient. He is also a friend and confidant o...
Read full storyPaulina Gretzky To Protest In Bahrain - Naked
(API)- Paulina Gretzky, daughter of hockey player, Wayne Gretzky, has publicly stated that she plans to protest human rights abuses in Bahrain by running up and down pit row in nothing but her smile during the F1 grand prix. Ms. Gretzky, who rece...
Read full storyNorth Korean Penis Shock
A North Korean Penis has reached an early climax. This shock news cums after a test led to a series of disastrous events which engulfed the Asian power. The prick exploded prematurely scattering debris over a large area. Japanese warnings of a...
Read full storyNorth Korean Rocket Failure
A recent attempted satellite launch by North Korea failed when the rocket malfunctioned and crashed into the sea. Korean state television hailed this a mighty success for the imperious new leader Kim Jong-un. Deputy Korean leader Kim Wunmad-guy...
Read full storyAnn Coulter and Barack Obama
Ann Hart Coulter and Barack Hussein Obama are to be married Saturday evening at the Birther Hotel & Spa in Old Town Alexandria, VA. Haid D'Salaami, a Muslim cleric, will perform the ceremony. Shaif Hirboush will be Ms. Coulter's maid of honor, wh...
Read full storyThe Surefire Republican Ways To Revive The Economy!!!
Start a new war to refocus attention off the bad state of national affairs and to bolster arm sales and allow corporate 'service' interests to leech money off the taxpayers to 'support' the military effort. Start a 'Threat To Be Terrified Of ' of…
Read full storyBernie Ecclestone To Buy Bahrain
UPI - President and CEO of Formula One Management, Bernie Ecclestone, has offered a down payment on the country of Bahrain, just weeks ahead of the Formula One race scheduled to be held there. Domestic tensions regarding human rights in the country h...
Read full storySecret Service Agents Deny Sex With Columbian Coeds: Merely "Hovering" At Discreet Distance
BILLINGSGATE POST - The eleven Secret Service Agents who were flown back to Washington for allegedly participating in an impromptu toga party with a like number of Columbian coeds, denied that any sexual activity occurred. A spokesperson for the Sec...
Read full storyFood Based Puns Increase after Canaries get 6 goal Stuffing from Man City
Norwich 1-6 Man City Norfolk. Home of turkey farms, incest and Norwich City Football Club. It is a widely reported statistical fact that the number of food based puns increases whenever Norwich, also known as the Canaries, are on the receiving...
Read full storyJunk and Disorderly
Once upon a time, there used to be many thriving brightly lit High Street shops, where happy, smiling, prosperous people would spend, spend, spend without a care in the world. Then one day, two evil witches by the name of 'Austerity' and 'Unemployment' descended upon the land and suddenly, without warning all the brightly lit shops began to close...faster than crap through a goose! Sadly, w...
Read full storyBlack Fox of Bassingbourn's twin brother 'causing terror in St John's Wood'
London - An extremely rare black fox mown down last month in a Bassingbourn, Cambridgeshire hit-n-run may have a secret twin sibling in North West London according to reports. "Damn beast's got an evil doppelganger," St John's Wood resident Major...
Read full storyToast appears on Jesus's face in Dorking Church
Worshippers at Dorking Unitarian Baptist Seventh Day Mormons church on West Street were astounded last week to discover toast on the face of Jesus in their church. "We went in for our two o'clock tea and biscuits," said Edgar Whistleblower, also o...
Read full storyPortsmouth Live To Fight Another Day - Super Fan 'Over The Moon'
A sensational victory at doomed Doncaster on Saturday means struggling Portsmouth managed to stave off relegation for another week. As Bristol City only managed a draw at Birmingham, cash-strapped, in-administration Pompey still have a mathematica...
Read full storySelected Political News for W/E: 15th April 2012
Sunday 8th April 2012 Topic: Public opinion - Cooked food VAT tax "85% say pasty tax has put them off Tories" Source: The People Extract: Half-baked George Osborne is today slammed as a clueless upper-crust toff over his Pastygate tax. Half-baked George Osborne is today slammed as a clueless upper-crust toff over his Pastygate tax. The Chancellor stands accused of being totally out of touch...
Read full storyMy Senior Moments - W/E Sunday 15th April 2012 - Two
Monday 9th April 2012 * Up at 0300hrs - To the WC, cup of tea, pain killers, to the WC, on the Spoof, up to the WC, spill tea over me knees... luckily it was no longer hot, to the WC... usual morning up to now (0505hrs). Tuesday 10th April 2012 * Up and on the web at 0020hrs this morning. Determined to keep any senior moments to a minimum! Wednesday 11th April 2012 * Went over too see Ste...
Read full storyNottingham News for W/E: 15th April 2012
Sunday 8th April 2012 Topic: Crime - murder - appeal "Notts man Neil Entwistle appeals against murder conviction" Source: Nottingham Post Extract: Neil Entwistle, 32, convicted of murdering his wife and baby daughter at their US home has launched a formal appeal against his conviction. Entwistle, a former IT consultant from Kilton, Worksop, formally filed an appeal yesterday after arguing he...
Read full storyHostage Drama at Nottingham Junior School
Police responded with dogs, helicopter, and ARV (Armed Response Vehicle) to a call for help, from the Some Saints Junior School this morning at 0928hrs. They sealed off all roads surrounding the school, apart from the one to the bookies. A stat...
Read full story'CSI-Nottingham' TV series to be made
Following the huge success of the American CSI series, CSI Las Vegas, CSI New York, CSI Miami, and CSI Los Angeles, the BBC have applied for permission to make an English CSI Nottingham Series. Originally thought to be impracticable by the £406k salaried BBC's Director of Vision, Jana Bennett, as she was made aware that after the cutbacks, Nottingham has only 4 members left in its Forensic Scie...
Read full storyDorking Base Jumper Killed In Tragic Accident
One of the world's lesser known base jumpers was killed today, whilst attempting a base jump which went tragically wrong. The Dorking base jumper, Albert Plummet, was attempting another daring base jump from Leith Hill Tower, just a stone's throw...
Read full storyNorth Korea Admits Giant Firework Was A Dud
PYONGYANG, NORTH KOREA--In a rare and unprecedented move, North Korean officials have been forced to admit that their 90-ton firework was a complete and utter dud. The entertainment device, which North Korea has assured the world was the largest a...
Read full storyBeijing Warns China Will Attack If Philippine Naval Buildup In Calituban Bohol Continues
The Philippine-China conflict over ownership of the Spratlys has reached a critical point warns international analysts as Beijing raised a protest against the Philippine Navy's massive buildup. According to Beijing, satellite imagery taken in early A...
Read full storyPresident Obama Reveals That The U.S. Secret Service - Colombian Hooker Story Was Simply A CIA Diversionary Ploy
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Vice-President Joe Biden speaking from the White House Rose Garden informed the members of the White House press corps not to be concerned about the so called HookerGate incident. The vice-president stated that President Obama h...
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