Roman Abramovich still in love with Jose Mourinho
Chelsea owner Roman Abramovich has sent out the clearest message yet that he is not 'over' old flame Jose Mourinho. The Russian Billionaire, was on his knees begging Jose not to leave according to captain John Terry, after a tear stained split wit...
Read full storyAmy Winehouse Makes An Absolute Fool of Herself at Her Comeback Concert in Belgrade, Serbia
BELGRADE, Serbia - Amy Winehouse showed the music world what a person who is bent on self-destruction looks like. The English singer who is the female equivalent of America's Charlie "The Space Cadet" Sheen stumbled, staggered, and stammered all o...
Read full storyWife Crazy Glues Weiner To Bed So He Can't Pole Vault Out Without Arousing Her
THE WEINER REPORT: Huma Abedin and Representative Anthony Weiner were married in the garden of Oheka Castle on Long Island in a ceremony officiated by President William Jefferson Clinton approximately 11 months ago. Huma, who is a long time aid to...
Read full storyAttempt to deliver whale fails
Confusion surrounded the small market town of Ashby-de-la-douche last week as two men in blue overcoats attempted, and failed to deliver a 100 tonne blue whale to a Mr. Nobody. All seemed well up until the point where they had to physically place...
Read full storyRoad Trip! On the Trail Following the Kennedy Mystique ; Drinking and Womanizing in New England!
Armed with a meager allowance from The Spoof (The US Edition), stringer Wally Wordsmithe is on a 3 week road trip to retrace the famous steps of the infamous Kennedy Clan as he's off to New England to visit some of the Pubs made famous by the gin gu...
Read full storyHoodies to be made compulsory for teenagers
In a bold move, the Conservative Liberal alliance has moved to make the wearing of so-called Hoodies compulsory for anybody under the age of seventeen. The fashion accessory has become de rigueur among boys, and, increasingly, girls. It is often a...
Read full storySerena Williams blames new earrings for her second set wobble
Speaking after her 6-3, 3-6, 6-1 win over Aravane Rezai in Wimbeldon the Women's Wimbledon Winner was emotional, and claimed to be drained. "Rezai gave me a massive game," Williams said. "Especially in the second set. For a time I was actually wor...
Read full storyRatarsed Solstice Druids disturb rare Parliament Hill spider habitat
London - Drunken Druids have trashed a UNESCO-protected tube-web spider colony in North London's Parliament Hill tonight. Annual Summer Solstice revelry descended into farce around a quarter past six, Hampstead time, just as the sun began its annu...
Read full storyPrince William and The Duchess of Cambridge Friend Arrested Over Lulz Sec Scandal
Prince William's friend from Eton school has been arrested by the Cyber Police after a tiny computer error led them to his door. Jeremy Carlton-Smythe, who is the son of a prominent London Banker, is believed to have provided the Lulz Sec Comput...
Read full storyThe Spoof John o Groats bike run first leg; John O to Thurso!
22.06.2011, John O Groats, Bonny Scotland; 0500 AM (and it's fucking freezing!) Accompanied by his support team of a toothless, chewing Shetland pony, several horny Highland cattle, a force 8 gale and buckets of rain, Jaggedone set out on the first leg of the "Spoof charity bike run from John O Groats to Lands End" and he even remembered to apply his bike clips before leaving. There was no opti...
Read full storyRomney Looks to End Campaign with Hilarious Gaff
NEW HAMPSHIRE - Political advisers are urging presidential-hopeful Mit Romney to do something very funny and embarrassing within the next fourteen days, thus ending his campaign with an act of public-service. "I know Mit, and he's in this thin...
Read full storyRep Weiner Honored As Trailblazer by Fellow Genitalia-Named
WASHINGTON D.C.- Though Representative Anthony Weiner announced his resignation Thursday, a small-but-loyal group is planning to honor the troubled New Yorker for their own reasons. 'People With Genital Names' is a loose organization for the awk...
Read full storyTremor Strikes Woman
Mr. Florence Nightingale - Reporting from any old tatty street in any old tatty town A very tall lady who is believed to have originated from Tommy Cooper's old Fez hat has caused great unrest today. Miss Understanding, 46, was describing to a flock of pigeons how she turned London Mayor Boris Johnson into Barney Rubble (of Flintstones fame), when the tremor struck her. The effects of the...
Read full storyI35 Fender Bender Leaves Man With Head Jammed Firmly Up His Own Ass
Emporia, Kansas, - Seasoned law enforcement veterans from Emporia had to take a time out today after attending the scene of a horrific car crash on I35, which left one man with his head jammed so far up his own ass that he was able to chew on his own...
Read full storyCriminals no longer to be offered "two for the price of one" on serious crimes
A controversial scheme in which criminals were allowed to commit two crimes but only go to prison for one of them has been scrapped. Minister of Justice Herbert Folly has said he will no longer try to get the law enacted, explaining that when he had...
Read full storyNina Dobrev, Ian Somerhalder, and Paul Wesley Talk Openly About The Upcoming Season Of 'The Vampire Diaries'
BEVERLY HILLS - The three stars of the hit television show The Vampire Diaries recently met for dinner at the trendy Cafe La French Fry in Beverly Hills. The young trio of actors spoke openly with Pico de Gallo of Tittle Tattle Tonight. They we...
Read full storyAndre Villas-Boas to become the world's most expensive seat warmer
Porto coach Andre Villas-Boas looks set to become the world's most expensive seat warmer after reports suggested Chelsea were prepared to trigger a clause in his contract which stipulates he can leave if a club is prepared to pay £13.2m for his space...
Read full storyBrian Haw sets up 'anti-cancer' camp at Heaven's gates
Anti-war campaigner, Brian Haw, who died of cancer last Friday has reportedly set up an 'anti-cancer' camp at the 'Pearly Gates' and is refusing to move on until God removes cancer from his portfolio of ways to die. An apolplepletic St Peter is sa...
Read full storyLetters To The Editor - About Nothing Really Worthwhile
Dear Editor, I'm not usually one to commit pen to paper. However, in this instance I have made an exception, basically because I found a blank sheet of A4 paper, and as I had a pen to hand, I thought it would be a shame to waste the opportunity. I'm not quite sure what it is I want to say here, or what kind of message I'm trying to convey, but it would just seem like a wasted opportunity if I d...
Read full storyObama declares, "Boehner's My Bestie!"
Washington - Nobody could have predicted that Saturday's "golf summit" between political adversaries, President Barack Obama and House Speaker John Boehner, would have turned into such a rip-roaring good time. After a successful round of golf, ple...
Read full storyUniversity Fees "Policy Car Crash" Agrees Academic
A leading academic yesterday attacked the Government's tuition fees policy as a "slow car crash." Sir Peter Scott's comments came three weeks after controversial historian Ken Lucid [url target="_self"]http://www.thespoof.co.uk/news/spoof.cfm?head...
Read full story'Wannabe Gary McKinnon' busted in Lulzsec hack probe
Wickford, Essex - Ryan Cleary, a 19 year old IT buff, 'was just tracking aliens in the IMF' when cops pounced early this morning. Officers from the Serious & Disorganised Crime Agency seized tin foil hats and laptops in the Essex raid followin...
Read full storyReverend Al Sharpton Claims That Oprah Winfrey Is His "Love Child"
BROOKLYN - Reverend Al Sharpton, who up until now has been maintaining a low-profile announced that the former talk show queen Oprah Winfrey is his 'Love Child.' Rev. Sharpton spoke with LaSabrosa Yazoo of Afro Sheen Magazine and told her that he...
Read full storyGlastonbury, it might rain, a bit.
Glastonbury 2011: With mere hours to go until festival-goers descend on Worthy Farm to watch headline acts including Frank Sidebottom, Beyonce and The Wurzles, organisers warn fans to bring wellies, raincoats, inflatable dingies and distress flares.
Read full storyColdplay's Chris Martin Booked Beyonce For Glastonbury, Gwyneth furious!
Coldplay frontman Chris Martin is hiding down the pub since incurring the wrath of her indoors. Apparently the lovely Gwyneth, no honest, she is lovely, it's not her fault that she was named after a sheep, anyhoo, the lovely Gwyneth is in one hec...
Read full storyTickets Now Sold at Casey Anthony Trial to Watch People Fight to get into the Casey Anthony Trial
The courthouse in Orlando, Florida where the Casey Anthony murder trial is being held has started selling tickets to by-standers who wish to watch the people waiting in line to enter the courtroom for the trial, beat the crap out of one another. A...
Read full storyThe Vancouver Kissing Couple Invited To A White House Barbecue
WASHINGTON, D.C. - White House Press Secretary Cal Colfax has just confirmed that President and Mrs. Obama have extended an invitation to Scott Jones and his girlfriend Alex Thomas, alias "The Vancouver Kissing Couple" to attend a White House Barbecu...
Read full storySarah Palin Was Asked To Name The Five Great Lakes
CLEVELAND - Sarah Palin stopped off in Cleveland on her Nationwide Bus Tour. She told a gathering of 27 people in a parking lot at a local Mrs. Al Capone Pizza Parlor that she has always loved Cleveland. She said that when she heard that the NFL C...
Read full storyLost Agatha Christie Manuscript found on Wikileaks
A previously unknown Agatha Christie manuscript was uncovered on Wikileaks by a graduate student at Whatsa Matta University, which is also, known as Whatsa Matta U. The manuscript is titled: Murder in a Hovel. Unlike most of her mystery novels which take place in settings of wealth and prestige, this one takes place in a one room hovel that is located in a fishing village along the North Sea.
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