Love You Long Time Dot Com Name Not Taken
Mephistophel, Tennessee (IPP) - Computer anthropologists were astounded to discover today that the name or domain name of Love You Long Time Dot Com (LYLTDC) has not been taken yet.
Read full storyComputer Catches Herpes Virus
Pahokee, Florida (IPP) - Scientists in Pahokee, Florida report that for the first time a human herpes simplex virus has transmutated and afflicted itself upon a computer.
Read full storyElephant Girl to Appear on American Idol
Hollywood, California (IPP) - Elephant girl will appear on American Idol this week. Stage hands are busy making preparations for the 857 pound American beauty and singing wonder.
Read full storyHaut de la Garenne house of horrors: police say trap door leads to Nazi-era tunnel to Vatican
St Helier, Jersey - (Reuterus): Police investigating the Haut de la Garenne child molester scandal say a trap door in the former children's home cellar leads straight to a Colditz-style Nazi era tunnel to the Vatican.
Read full storyMichelle Obama caught shopping for tiara at Tiffany's - "Gotta get ready for our coronation" she tells reporters
Barack Obama's wife, Michelle Obama, was caught shopping for expensive tiaras at New York's famous Tiffany's jewelry store.
Read full storyHeidi Klum spices up her marriage to Seal by proposing a hot ménage à trios with Britney, inviting her to come over and play house
Hollywood, California - First, it was Rosie O'Donnell that invited Britney Spears live on "The View" to come live with her. Now it is supermodel, Heidi Klum, who is the latest to offer Britney a place to crash. All the while Britney tec...
Read full storyTexas Republicans vote for Obama to keep Hillary out of White House
ALAMO, TEXAS: Hordes of pro-Obama American media have arrived at this historical site itching to celebrate Hillary's downfall. Headlines have been written, post-mortem articles are waiting to be...
Read full storyParis Hilton dogs Paris Hilton with lawsuit
In a development that is sure to rivet the attention of celebrity tabloid readers around the world for several seconds until they realize what it's actually about, the Hilton International Hotel and Convention Center in Paris, Fr...
Read full storyUpskirting entrepreneur to target tourists
Derrick Tugstaff, 43, of Spokane USA, has put a cheeky new twist on the familiar scene of photographers snapping holidaymakers and selling the pictures back to them.
Read full storyParanoid Persons Being Followed Around
Palo Alto, California (IPP) - Scientists working at the Palo Alto Think Tank and Reseach Facility (PATTRARF) have discovered that paranoid people really are being followed around.
Read full storyBarbie and Crew Arrested for Attack on Bratz
In an attempt to save her 'sister' Skipper from the 'wrong' crowd, Barbie and friends set out to lay the smackdown on the Bratz gang. Unfortunately, the Bratz thoroughly dominated, with new and fashionable clothing, iPods, and make up...
Read full storyNorth Carolina Lottery Eliminates Number 4
Raleigh, North Carolina (IPP) - The North Carolina lottery has announced that the number Four (4) has been removed from the PICK 3 game. In its place an additional Zero (0) and or Nine (9) have been added in an alternating system. The number Four (...
Read full storyAmerican Idol Contestants Paid Not to Play Music
Hollywood, California (IPP) - A team working on a television special about American Idol contestants recently discovered that most of these people are making big money for not performing. The contestants land gigs that pay good money but once they p...
Read full storyJews Found Guilty, Forced To Pay Restitution
In what was slated as the trial of the century, the entire Jewish population of the world has been found guilty of the murder of Jesus.
Read full storyFed, Candidates Promise More of Same
The Fed today announced that it would continue to fight the recession, which was caused by the expansion of the money supply and excessive government expenditures, by printing $6 trillion new dollars, and spending it.
Read full storyNext Earthquake May Split The Earth In Half, Warn Scientists
Another earthquake of a similar magnitude to that experienced in the UK this week, could split the Earth in two, say barmy scientists. The Earth, they say, is going through volatile and unprecedented changes, and is extremely prone to another majo...
Read full story16 Trillion Troublesome Plastic Bags To Be Launched Into Outer Space
An environmental group has said that it intends to launch more than 16 trillion plastic bags into space in a bid to halt the enormous effect on global warming and climate change that...
Read full storyParis and Nicky Hilton Star In The Other, Other Boleyn Gulls!
Most thought that Paris Hilton could do little more than show her breasteses on the skinternet and that her sister Nicky was a dollar short and a cuntry mile shy. But in the newest, latest British histerical drama a...
Read full storyTouch-me-not
My post, 'Hand that Flattens Own Agitator', was about Mr. Nicolas Paul Stéphane Sarközy de Nagy-Bocsa, President of France visiting President George Bush in USA. In his trip, Mr. Sarkozy was not accompanied by his wife Cécilia Ciganer-Albeniz. Before the cameras, we observed some bizarre behaviors including Sarkozy's inserting his left hand deep into the pocket of his over-sized jacket...
Read full storyBush Didn't Know Gasoline "Costs Money"!
In a Worst President Ever (WPE) Press conference, WPE, GWB, was caught off guard by a member of the Press' question about the multiple economic predictions about $4 a gallon gasoline. It seems that the son of the man who had never seen a grocery...
Read full storyYankees' Florida Legends Field to Be Renamed Steinbrenner Stadium
The NY Yankees spring training facility, Legends Field, is to be renamed Steinbrenner Stadium in a ceremony conducted by Steinbrenner Brothers, Hal and Hank. Baseball field landscape designer, Frank Lloyd Formfollasfunk believes he has created the ba...
Read full storyEvery Actor in Hollywood Overdoses on Drugs At Same Time
Los Angeles hospitals and emergency rooms were taxed to the limit when every actor in Hollywood overdosed on prescription medication at the same time.
Read full storyPrince Hari Kiri the Puppet Monarch's wannabe Sir Galahad
London - (Tora Bora Mess): Prince Hari Kiri is coming home after thousands of British soldiers complained bitterly about the little shit being singled out for lavish self-publicity while they remained in mortal danger behind Taleban enema lines.
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