London - (Tora Bora Mess): Prince Hari Kiri is coming home after thousands of British soldiers complained bitterly about the little shit being singled out for lavish self-publicity while they remained in mortal danger behind Taleban enema lines.
The Puppet Monarch's latest stunt has been branded yet another reckless flop in the continuing tragedy of the Cult of Diana.
Prince Hari Kiri's return to London has prompted the regrouping of legions of potential Jihadis hellbent on nuking Buckingham Palace in retaliation for this latest caper.
Predictably, the Puppet Monarchy's countless previous ritual rejuvenation attempts have all ended belly-up, just like this latest psychodrama involving royal butler Paul Burrell's son Prince Harry, cast as the nation's latter day Sir Galahad.
Ministry of Defence sources are said to be livid today after an etiolating reality TV circus filmed the gingernut impostor mincing round the Tora Bora hills, decked out in fetching designer fatigues and performing stupendous acts of unimaginable bravery....like taking an early morning dump on a scorpion's nest in the desert or nursing a giant gnat bit on his freckled arse.
Hari Kiri is named after the oriental ritual suicide that defeated impostors whose shame was 'too unbearable' would use to restore their honor in death.
Camilla is 69.
