
It's Official: Barbie and Ken Split Up
After 43 years of non-wedded, perhaps pretended bliss, Barbie and Ken split up.
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The Wrath of Khan
A.Q. Khan, the ‘Father of Pakistan's Bomb' has reportedly suffered a heart attack, just two weeks after receiving a full pardon for selling Pakistan's nuclear secrets to anybody with fifty bucks and Mc Donald's gift certificate in their pockets. Appa...
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President's Day Confusion
Washington, DC Today President Bush announced that everyone would have to give him a present. It was, after all, President's Day.
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Dick No Longer Appropriate Nickname Says Congresswoman
Washington, D.C. - Backlash from Janet Jackson's "boob" incident during the Super Bowl halftime show continues to be a hot topic on Capitol Hill. Republican Congresswoman Heather Wilson of New Mexico has announced that she will introduce a bill this...
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Taiwan's President Opens Door for Unification, Getting Hung By Toenails
TAIPEI -- Taiwan's president Chen Shui-bian does not rule out the possibility that the breakaway republic may eventually reunify with China, known for arresting and torturing dissidents such as the president of a breakaway republic.
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Harry Potter goes 'gay'?
JK Rowling today announced details of her upcoming "Harry Potter" book. She suggested, of course, that the book would be the "best yet", a claim she knew could become true once she had decided to turn our beloved do-gooder wizard,...
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Bush Denies Cross Dressing Past
Democratic Party leaders and high ranking Democrats in the House and Senate today called on President George W. Bush to release any records he may have that would prove that he never dressed in women's clothes and went by the name of Wilma.
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Tory shadow chancellor dies of five minute fame shock
Shadow Chancellor Oliver Letwin has died of shock after being told his keynote speech on Conservative spending policies was the focus of the first report on BBC daytime news.
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Pakistani nuclear scientist arrested for carrying 20kt bomb
Dr. A.Q. Khan, the father of the Pakistani nuclear program who was recently pardoned for publicly confessing of making millions through illicit foreign nuclear sales to N.Korea and Libya, was arrested today at Dulles Airport carrying a 20-kiloton bom...
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Hubble, Dubbya, WMD shock
The Hubble telescope has enabled scientists to observe the most distant object in the universe so far detected by man. Scientists at the California Institute of Far-fetched Phenomena today announced that despite recent problems with the mirror of the...
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Phone is Nokia's best yet
Nokia's new 6969 phone has been lauched with a blast. Nokia's CEO Mr Ned Nedler says "We put a lot, and I mean a lot, of money into this design because we see this phone as the new benchmark in technology."...
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Farting Tax Announced
A farting tax has been announced by the United Nations yesterday to help combat the number of green house emitions being emited into the Ozone Layer. The farting tax will effect every country on planet Earth.
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Police Academy: Out of Retirement
Captain Harris and his crazy crew are back after 20 years! This summer's most anticipated return of Police Academy 22: Out of Retirement, is the most anticipated movie this summer.
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President's Records Really Ramshackle
"Then he went outside to pee. He was a good soldier he. Went outside when he needed to to pee. For lunch he had spinach wraps. We paid him $7.35 an hour for his militaryism."...
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Should Angry Older Folks Be Denied Access To Certain Movies?
"At least it was only a dollar!" older people can be heard saying, after seeing Academy Award Nominated films such as "Lost In Translation" in their local dollar theater. "What was that trash even about?" is another common collective comment made by groups of elderly people who insist on spending their time going to movies they "heard were good" when...
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