NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – One of the country’s leading financial experts recently stated that if Elon Musk were to convert all of his billions and billions of dollars into $100 bills and lay them end-to-end, they would stretch from Saturn, to M…
Can't tell your Lolcoin from your Kardashian marks? Well never fear, Geoff Swag here. I'm going to tell you all you need to know about cryptocurrencies. Nowadays every c**t has got their own cryptocurrency. Even Timmy Mallett has his "Malletts". Y…
A man who was told, last week, that, from today, he would no longer be paid in money, but that he would, instead, receive remuneration in peanuts, has said he is concerned over potential difficulties with the safe transfer of his salary into his bank…
A man who, only weeks ago, was told that he would be receiving his full salary again after an earlier pay cut, has been told to brace himself once more, as a 50% reduction in remuneration will come into force from Monday. Five days before Christma…
A man who gave up a perfectly good job in Thailand to go to live and work in Cambodia five years ago, and subsequently found out that salaries in the latter country were about half what they were in the former, recieved even worse news this week, whe…
The Manchester United and England defender, Harry Maguire, has spoken out about the considerable, and growing, number of fake news stories written about him, and remarked that he wished he had a ten-pound note for every one of them, for then, he woul…
As the world slowly but surely tries to get its act together with the roll-out of various COVID-19 vaccine programs, and governments start planning for economic recovery and a return to normal life, the Coronavirus itself has reacted to these effort…
As traditional football rivalries go, they don't get much bigger than this - Merseyside versus Greater Manchester - a sizzling northwest encounter in store for fans who have been waiting for this particular contest with eager anticipation since the f…
There were scenes of joy and jubilation in one city street earlier today, when a man out for a lunchtime saunter with his friend from work found some money in the street. Ambling along, chatting to his pal about nothing in particular, Moys Kenwood…
A gang of criminals who invested more than a million dollars in machinery and expertise they needed to get their potentially lucrative money-printing business off the ground have declared their company insolvent after a cataclysmic mistake during the…
There was a nasty surprise in store for one man last week, when a meeting with his supervisor alerted him to the fact that, for the forseeable future, he is going to have to do exactly the same amount of work he usually does, but will be paid only 60…
A man who had been experiencing severe financial difficulties before he eventually returned to work six weeks ago, has continued to exercise the spending constraints he imposed during the lockdown, claiming it is good practice for the future. Moys…
Marcus Rashford, the Manchester United and England striker who has done so much for hungry children by petitioning the government for free school meals during the lockdown, has "put his money where his mouth is", and has vowed to donate 90% of his sa…
An Englishman whose mind is in absolute turmoil with regard to how he is going to ensure the well-being of his young family after his own death, is going to rob a bank. The extremely ambitious plan was hatched today by Ken Moyswood (not real name)…
There was sensational news coming out of Old Trafford this morning, as Manchester United captain and England defender, Harry Maguire, made a shock announcement to the effect that he intends to retire from football, and to pursue a career in a differe…
The Premer League season may only have kicked off three weeks ago, but after a disastrous weekend for Manchester United, when they were humbled 6-1 by Tottenham Hotspur at Old Trafford, fans are keen to offload 'liability' central defender and captai…
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – There is no anti-Trump group that the Electoral College president hates more than the Lincoln Project. For one thing, every member is a Republican; and a Republican who knows that Donnie boy has about as much busine…
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