Can't tell your Lolcoin from your Kardashian marks? Well never fear, Geoff Swag here. I'm going to tell you all you need to know about cryptocurrencies.
Nowadays every c**t has got their own cryptocurrency. Even Timmy Mallett has his "Malletts". You don't want to go near them though.
In fact, don't go near any of them. They're all dodgy. Every one of 'em.
You see, a normal fiat currency is backed by a government or a national bank. So it's worth something - usually the institution is supported by the force of the law. A cryptocurrency is based on nothing but trust that a bunch of nerds have set up your account properly and not ripped you off.
There is one exception, and that is Spoofkoin. It's TheSpoof's own cryptocurrency. You can tell it's quality because it comes from the same place as the quality journalism you can read on TheSpoof.
I personally guarantee Spoofkoin is the best investment you will ever make. You can take that to the bank - well not really as they’re non-fungible.
Buy Spoofkoins by emailing your credit card details to email@example.com and using the email heading “gullible”.