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Funny satire stories about Manchester United

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Funny story: Paul Pogba Misses Another Penalty

Paul Pogba Misses Another Penalty

Paul Pogba, the Manchester United star who, after his penalty miss at Wolves the other night, was subjected to a hail of racist comments from people calling themselves United 'fans', has now become the subject of intense media speculation which is cl...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Is Going To Smash Prince Andrew's Face In, If He Sees Him

Harry Maguire Is Going To Smash Prince Andrew's Face In, If He Sees Him

As the Jeffrey Epstein paedophile case rages on, even after the mysterious death of the former financier, Manchester United defender Harry Maguire Is rumoured to have said that he is so disgusted with Epstein's former friend, Prince Andrew, that he i...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Taking Up Too Much Column Space

Harry Maguire Taking Up Too Much Column Space

There was controversy surrounding Manchester United's £80million newboy defender, Harry Maguire, this evening, when the player was adjudged by some people to have been taking up far too much column space in news pages, and to be 'hogging the limeligh...

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Funny story: Bury Burial Is On Friday

Bury Burial Is On Friday

There was sadness all across Greater Manchester last night, after it was announced that the funeral of Bury F.C. is to take place this Friday, after the English Football League rules the organisation "unfit for purpose", and has it put down humanely.

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Funny story: Peter Schmeichel Says Harry Maguire Is The Best Keeper In The World Right Now

Peter Schmeichel Says Harry Maguire Is The Best Keeper In The World Right Now

Former Manchester United 'custodian of the net', Peter Schmeichel, has said that the club's recent £80million signing of Harry Maguire was a shrewd move, as the former Sheffield United, Hull City and Leicester City player is the best goalkeeper in th...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire The Victim Of Sliding Tackle Near Manchester Arndale Centre

Harry Maguire The Victim Of Sliding Tackle Near Manchester Arndale Centre

There was controversy in Manchester's main shopping area yesterday afternoon, when United's new £80million signing, central defender, Harry Maguire, was the victim of a mindless attack from a member of the general public who approached the player at...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Is Sick And Tired Of All The Stupid Made-up Stories About Him

Harry Maguire Is Sick And Tired Of All The Stupid Made-up Stories About Him

Manchester United's new £80million star, Harry Maguire, has said he is absolutely "fed up to the back teeth" of all the stories about him circulating on the internet, in which there is absolutely no truth whatsoever. Maguire, 26, signed for United...

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Funny story: Is Gareth Bale On His Way To Hull City?

Is Gareth Bale On His Way To Hull City?

Gareth Bale, the Real Madrid and Wales footballer, who has fallen out of favour at the Bernabeu Stadium, may have found the ideal club with which to play out the rest of his career - Hull City. Bale, 30, is a man who knows what he likes, and he li...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Says He Didn't Sign Last Season Because Jose Mourinho Was Manager

Harry Maguire Says He Didn't Sign Last Season Because Jose Mourinho Was Manager

Manchester United central defender, Harry Maguire has revealed the real reason he didn't sign for the club a year ago, when Jose Mourinho was the Reds' boss: Jose Mourinho. Maguire, 26, had been on the United radar for the last two summer breaks,…

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Upset At Way Social Media Tossers Keep Spelling His Name Wrong

Harry Maguire Upset At Way Social Media Tossers Keep Spelling His Name Wrong

Harry Maguire, the central defender signed by Manchester United from Leicester City only last week, has spoken out against the countless thousands of people using social media who will insist on spelling his surname incorrectly. Maguire, who cost...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Given Go-ahead To Stay In Bed Late On Monday Morning

Harry Maguire Given Go-ahead To Stay In Bed Late On Monday Morning

Harry Maguire, the new pin-up boy of football, who signed for Manchester United for £80million from Leicester City last Monday, made his debut at Old Trafford against Chelsea this afternoon, and has received the go-ahead from manager Ole Gunnar Solsk...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Bookmakers' Favourite To Be UK Charts Christmas Number 1

Harry Maguire Bookmakers' Favourite To Be UK Charts Christmas Number 1

Harry Maguire, the new Manchester United signing who seems to be able to do just about anything everything he puts his hand to, has been made the bookmakers' favourite to reach number 1 in the UK charts at Christmas. This is astonishing news - eve...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire To Buy Some New Football Boots

Harry Maguire To Buy Some New Football Boots

Harry Maguire, the fresh-faced, good-looking golden boy of English football, who signed for Manchester United for £80million from Leicester City on Monday, says he might buy some new football boots, as a special treat to himself for becoming the most...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire To Read The News At Ten

Harry Maguire To Read The News At Ten

Harry Maguire, the one-time Hull City carthorse who earler this week signed for Manchester United from Leicester City, is a popular man. He's also extremely handsome. And muscular. That's the reason behind the BBC's decision to ask the £80milli...

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Funny story: Manchester United Give Harry Maguire Captain's Armband

Manchester United Give Harry Maguire Captain's Armband

Harry Maguire, the fresh-faced, good-looking golden boy of English football, signed by Manchester United for £80million from Leicester City on Monday, is to be given the Old Trafford captain's armband as a gesture of just how valuable an asset the cl...

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Funny story: Manchester United Manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's Head Is Getting Smaller

Manchester United Manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's Head Is Getting Smaller

Rumours are rife around Old Trafford this morning, as speculation rises that Manchester United coach Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's head is getting smaller. Solskjaer was photographed alongside new signing, £80million former Sheffield United, Hull City an...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire's Mam To Meet Her Majesty The Queen

Harry Maguire's Mam To Meet Her Majesty The Queen

There was rejoicing in South Yorkshire this afternoon, when the new Manchester United signing, Harry Maguire, broke the news to his dear old mam, that she had been invited to tea with Her Majesty the Queen. Maguire completed his move from Leiceste...

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