Is Gareth Bale On His Way To Hull City?

Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 15 August 2019

image for Is Gareth Bale On His Way To Hull City?
Bale waiting for the Allams outside Bob Carver's

Gareth Bale, the Real Madrid and Wales footballer, who has fallen out of favour at the Bernabeu Stadium, may have found the ideal club with which to play out the rest of his career - Hull City.

Bale, 30, is a man who knows what he likes, and he likes fish and chips. Where better, then, to indulge your dietary nirvanic fantasies than the home of fried fish and chips, in the isolated East Yorkshire outpost?

The Tigers, currently languishing in mid-table in the Championship, are looking for someone of Bale's ability, and had talks with the player in Hull city centre yesterday.

Bale met up with the owners, father-and-son duo, Assem and Ehab Allam, who splashed out, and took the Wales star to Bob Carver's, a famous purveyor of both Cod and Haddock, along with big, fat, chunky chips, not the kind that stick together as if daubed with superglue.

Bale was impressed, not least by the haddock, and said:

"The haddock was succulent and meaty, fried to perfection, and hanging off the ends of the large plate. The chips were faintly browned - as I prefer them - and the mushy peas delicious. I was never treated like this by Zinedine Zidane!"

Former City player, Harry Maguire, told reporters it was his biggest regret when he left the club for Leicester in 2017. He said:

"Not being able to get a good fish supper every night was my biggest regret when I left Hull. There'll always be a place in my heart for Hull and haddock."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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