A soldier today told how he was really mortified that Prince Charles was still alive. Gunner Peter Parfitt said "He was alive when I went out to fight for Queen and Country. He is still alive now that I'm coming back. The thing is, he keeps crying an...
A Buckingham Palace spokesperson for the Prince of Wales, Prince Charles, has said that His Royal Highness would consider any moves by Iranian clerics to install him as the next Ayatollah (or ultimate Spiritual and Political Head) of Iran. The cr...
Highgrove House - (Love-in-a-Mist Mess): The body of royal florist Sarah Champier-Lowe's husband has been found at the mouth of the River Rat & Parret in what police have described as a classic venus flytrap sting. David Lowe's corpse was disc...
Buckingham Palace - 'er family haven deserted 'er fer the Dee-Doy weekend and haven been uninvited t' official services in France, Queen Elizabeth commemorated the occasion of the 65th Anniversary of t' Dee-Doy landing, alone by 'erself at palace.
A chauffeur was suspended today by Buckingham Palace, after claiming to have had access to highly sensitive facts about the personal lives of a female member of the Royal Family, and leaking them to the press. Charles Windsinghor, aged something,...
The Prince of Wales today asked people to end the slow, painful drift towards extinction of endangered species of animals, and to shoot them now to put them out of their misery. 'When one was in India', he said, 'bagging one's first tiger, well, o...
Shock, utter amazement and some understanding has spread through the nation like wild-fire as Prince Charles, the next-in-line to the throne, has revealed that he has same-sex tendencies, and has had for quite a while. The Prince admitted to repor...
The giant frog which appeared alongside Prince Charles and sons Wills and Harry in a wacky, off the wall, save the rainforest internet broadcast was a reluctant participant according to Royal insiders. The broadcast, which also featured Mork, the...
Rome - (Unholy Mess): In a prime time televised audience on Monday the Pope will tell Prince Charles 'why he had Diana topped' and hand him the legal bills for all the ensuing ungodly fuss. Charles and his live-in fag hag Camilla are travelling to...
Susan Boyle is relocating to Clarence House and Camilla Bowles is sent packing. In a bizarre escalation of events "Britain's Got Bullocks" star Susan Boyle has become the press darling, and in a tribute to the common folk, Buckingham Palace had invit...
A spokesperson for Prince Charles today announced an unusual business partner for the Prince. Liz Hurley, glamourous model and crap actress, has taken up organic farming. Her wares are to be sold by the Prince's Duchy Originals, a brand known for ove...
Reports from the national press appear to suggest that HRH The Prince Of Wales has expressed an interest in assisting the Lancashire Borough of Burnley through times of economic hardship,reports which may well rebound on him and break his face, accor...
Adverts for two herbal remedies, made by Bonny Prince Charlie's firm Quacky Aboriginal Nonsensicals, are 'complete and utter bollocks', the regulatory group Medicines That Often Dowork, MTOD, said today. 'The ads are total pish', MTOD's chief exec...
Prince Charles has arrived in the Galapagos Islands during his world tour. He is expected to visit Lonesome George. A slow-moving depressed individual with no apparent purpose to live and nothing to look forward to, Charles will spend time with the g...
Cock-headed paparazzi pimp, Darryn Lyons has revealed startling photographs of the Prince of Wales during a secret 'love-in' with Coronation Street's Gail Hillman on the Galapagos Islands. The photographs, which are expected to net Lyons more than...
Prince Charles today spoke movingly of his pain every Mother's Day. As a packed audience listened in hushed silence Charles told them of his "vast and overpowering despair" at this time of year. "Every year I keep hoping that it will be the last,...
Berkshire - (Toxic Ass Mess): Triple Michelin-starred Fat Duck restaurateur Heston Services Blue-Mental has accused Prince Charles' Duchy Originals range of detox remedies of outright quackery. The complaint follows the closure of the Berkshire ea...
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