MOSCOW, Russia – (World News) – The government of Russia has issued a statement which states that anyone caught without a medical mask could risk being shot on sight.
The Kremlin Voice stated that President Vladimir Putin is fed up and will no longer play games with this dreaded Coronavirus off-shoot called the Commavirus.
He added that reckless, uncaring inhabitants of Panpansania, Upper Titaluna, and Mookaslavia will no longer be allowed into Russia.
Putin then let it be known that residents of those three countries, who are already in Russia will be picked up and flown to Bangkok, Thailand.
He noted that a Commavirus expert in Iceland, stated that because of Russia’s proximity to the sun, it lends itself to be a carrier of the Stipatookis bacteria germ which can carry more Commavirus bacteria particles than a full-grown adult yak.
Putin has made it abundantly clear to neighboring Lithuania, Belarus, and Sweden, that if any of their citizens bring in the Commavirus, that country will risk having it’s shipment of Russian Salad Dressing terminated immediately.