Written by joseph k winter

Thursday, 29 November 2018

image for Eugenie Bouchard at Pecker Island forgot her tennis racket
Miss Bouchard's aides also forgot their tennis rackets

Renowned blond tennis star, Eugenie Bouchard, is completely enjoying the sun and breezes at Richard Branson’s Necker Island.

Currently underway, there is what is known as “the world’s sexiest tennis tournament.”

On her second day on the island, Ms. Bouchard was startled to realize she had forgotten her tennis rackets and other accoutrements of the sport.

Asked whether “balls” were missing, she murmured, “That, no, I don’t think so.”

On the other hand, her wardrobe of bikinis and thongs had not been left behind, so that she could display a narrow sort of fore-serve to adoring fans.

Her smile is also renowned, along with slanted leg at the knee, and pigeon-toed stance, including thrust of upper chestwork toward the heavens.

In one already-famous moment, Ms. Bouchard took up a characteristic pose in narrow white bikini, with hands touching at the hip region.

Some censors on the island, carefully checking all images released to the world, thought this position of the hands suggested she was about to lower the bikini.

A strip-tease was about to take place?

They were uncertain whether a threshold of decency for tennis tournaments might have been crossed.

Ms. Bouchard then appeared to push down the sides of the bikini somewhat, a suggestive maneuver, and censors, in confusion, retired from the question.

However, the lovely tennis star then thrust herself down onto her stomach, with rear-serve at the ready.

The censors returned post-haste to their considering with thumbs up and smiling.

One of them remarked:

“Fore and aft are definitely moving ahead in world appreciation of beauty, and the finer lines the physiological can offer.”

“We are, perhaps, a little more careful with ‘fore’ than ‘aft’ at this point, what with the popularity of bums and bum lifts, and all that.”

“Also, of course, with ‘fore,” we must be fastidious not to cross the lines of decency.”

“After all, tennis stars are not harlots.”

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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