Written by Wesley Janson

Monday, 23 July 2018

With a belly that has been perfectly formed over a 30-year period of eating TV Dinners and drinking beer, 55-year-old Shane Wall didn't seem to notice, or even care, that his pants had slipped down at work and that his big, hairy, sweaty ass was showing for everyone to see.

Shane, a maintenance mechanic who works at Ted & Todd's International Lumber, a factory that produces furniture items and composite decking boards, bent over to fix a pipe without realizing that his belly had caused his pants to slip down, completely exposing his ass for co-workers, his supervisor, a newly hired female administrative assistant, the company president, and a team of about 15 corporate visitors to see.

Vanessa Lockland, a corporate member and loving mother of three, walked past Shane as he was bent over and was immediately traumatized. When found outside in the parking lot weeping, she stated that she simply couldn't get the image out of her mind.

"It was horrible, and now it's burned into my memory forever!" she said as tears rolled down her face.

Vanessa was allowed 4 days of "sick leave" as well as free counseling with a therapist.

When asked if he had known that his ass was hanging out, Shane looked confused for a moment and then made the following statement:

"Huh? Oh well."

After saying that, he picked his nose, wiped it on his shirt, farted, and then went back to work on the pipe he was trying to fix.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: Local, bum




Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
70 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more