Aaron Rodgers takes to solitary confinement to get through some tough decisions

Funny story written by joseph k winter

Sunday, 12 February 2023

image for Aaron Rodgers takes to solitary confinement to get through some tough decisions
Torturous introspection runs throughout the history of the human species

As reported by NBC Sports News, Mr. Rodgers will enter solitary confinement on Monday to assist him with important decisions he needs to make.

Mr. Brady has expressed admiration for this manner of responding to quandaries affecting life's course.

He is rumored to have said, “Fortunately, Giselle came to me, although we are divorced, and helped me make the decision to retire. At least for the moment.”

At stake for Mr. Rogers the problems are excruciating. Should he:

a) Retire, as Tom has done. Hell, unretiring is always an option in a few weeks.

b) Do one more year with the Packers, especially if he could get Davonte back.

c) Move to some other team (at of course more money) as with Detroit or even as back up to the Forty Niners.

d) Work on getting a ten year 375 million-dollar NFL analyst deal (like Tom did--or maybe a 400 million dollar deal).

Solitary confinement favors the hard choices, what with the gloom inside iron bars and toilet with no seat.

A bunk bed on the order of a brick surface means his shivering against the cold won't hurt either.

Through the dark night, assisted by the screams of fellow inmates, Mr. Rodgers should be able to face his difficulties with maximum awareness of where he has come to.

Additionally, when he enters the NFL Hall of Fame this moment in his history will add luster to this monument's records and glory.

NFL sports commentators are reported eager to interview him on his ordeal inside solitary confinement quarters.

NBC Sports is planning a week's analysis from 8 - 5 Monday through Friday on these developments.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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