MEXICO CITY – President Andres Manuel Lopez-Obrador, aka “Timmy,” has just informed the United States ambassador that his country is offering to lend the United States $900,000.
The president of Mexico stated that his government fully understands that, due to President Trump’s seemingly never-ending flailing in the constantly churning economic waters of fraudulent unpresidential manifestations, he is basically running the country into a systematically suppressed septic tank of shitness.
He further noted that, if Trump doesn’t stop acting like a 3-year-old spoilt brat with diaper rash, he is not only going to destroy the U.S. economy, as we know it, but, quite possibly, most of the economies of the world’s other 196 countries.
The president of Mexico received a call from President Trump graciously accepting his generous loan offer.
Trump then called back a few minutes later, and asked him if he could also FedEx about 90-or-so avocados to the White House.