Ivanka Trump's personal Vagazelizer today tested positive for Covid-19. The President's little temptress was furious to find out that someone servicing her so personally had contracted a disease.
Ivanka Trump was not available for comment, but sources close to the first family said, "If Dad was hot as lava the other day to hear his valet was sick, I'd say she was as hot as a twat on Satan's house cat. She came very close to taking Jared's head off with a vase she threw at him."
The Vagazelizer in question was reached at home where she is presently not exhibiting symptoms, but said, "Oh, I knew that cunt would be pissed as a parrot that can't shut up! And that little pencil dick she married is runnin' scared too. He ain't got no future."
The White House is clearly shaken by the exposure to the virus, but thankful that they have CDC guidelines to help them protect themselves.