The White House Has Run Out of Toilet Paper

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 14 March 2020

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The president told his middle son Eric to go buy some toilet paper but Eric simply forgot.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Two of the White House maids have disclosed to a reporter with The Washington Globe Express that the huge mansion at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue has run out of toilet paper.

The two White House maids, who did not want to give their names -
so I’ll simply refer to them as Gertrud Osterholm, 27, and Helga Gunnarlunt, 31 - are afraid that POTUS would have them deported back to Sweden if he found out that they talked to the media.

Miss Osterholm said that they told the president about the toilet paper situation ten days ago, and he said that he would have Eric, 36, go to Kroger and buy a case of Charmin.

Helga said that Eric, apparently, did not write it down, and everyone knows that “Goofy”, as first lady Melania calls him, simply is extremely forgetful.

Miss Gunnarlunt remarked, “Dat Eric fella, I hate ta be saying, but he does have da memory span of a baby gnat, he does.”

The two maids said that they are going to try and see if they can talk to the White House Barbie (Ivanka), and see if they have a little more luck with her.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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