Bomb Bomb China: Trump To Use Neutron Bomb To Get Rid Of Coronavirus

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Friday, 28 February 2020

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No More Coronavirus

BILLINGSGATE POST: In a call to Chinese President, Xi Jinping, President Trump said they discussed carpet bombing China with neutron bombs to knock out the Coronavirus, which originated in China, killing untold thousands while pummeling world financial markets.

A neutron bomb, officially defined as a type of enhanced radiation weapon (ERW), is a low-yield thermonuclear weapon designed to maximize lethal neutron radiation in the immediate vicinity of the blast, while minimizing the physical power of the blast itself. The neutron release generated by a nuclear fusion reaction is intentionally allowed to escape the weapon, rather than being absorbed by its other components.

In a nutshell, the neutron blast can penetrate any surface, completely sanitizing underlying viruses and bacteria up to a depth of two feet, thus making it more lethal as a tactical weapon against the Coronavirus than even a country-wide, balls-to-the-wall, Stanley Steamer treatment. The reduced blast damage was seen as an important advantage over using Stanley Steamer to cleanse China of the virus.

The neutron bomb, although lethal to humans and animals, does not destroy buildings and infrastructure; thus allowing for the eventual repopulation of the decimated countries. Although Trump and Xi admitted that it was a draconian measure, both agreed that, left unchecked, the virus would cause the stock market to dip even lower.

The only concession Xi Jinping asked for, was a “heads up” so that he and his family could leave China before the bombing commenced.

Slim: “Bombs away! Let Buddha sort them out.”

Dirty: “Yo, Dude. AI Robots are gonna take over anyway. You reap what you sow.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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