Hannibal Lecter Seen Exiting Saudi Embassy With New Lampshade

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Thursday, 18 October 2018

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BILLINGSGATE POST: A newly-released video showing forensic psychiatrist and taxidermist, Dr. Hannibal Lecter, carrying a lampshade out of the Saudi Embassy in Istanbul was released this morning as part of the probe into the disappearance of journalist, Jamal Khashoggi.

Although Saudi Arabia has denied involvement in Khashoggi’s disappearance, the fact that Hannibal Lecter was shown leaving the Embassy, has provided new fodder to speculation that Khashoggi was killed and dismembered by a Saudi team working for Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman.

President Trump has speculated, without providing evidence, that “rogue killers” could be responsible. Noting that Hannibal Lecter certainly fits in this category, Trump mentioned that he would defer judgment until Forsenic Taxidermist, Dr. Viscount Billingsgate, examined the lampshade allegedly carried out of the Embassy by Lecter.

President Trump:

"If this lampshade contains DNA from Mr. Khashoggi, there will a price to be paid by those who flaunt their power in the Mid East. Hopefully, this lampshade will shine some light on the disappearance of Khashoggi."

Dr. Billingsgate, who received his doctorate in Taxidermy from La Fontaine College, is considered the last word in Forensic Taxidermy. His groundbreaking work in unveiling the “Jackalope hoax” is considered the “Magna Carta” of this profession. Through painstaking observation and experiment, he determined that the antlers mounted on a jackrabbit’s head were actually removed from an antelope and mounted on the jackrabbit by a clever taxidermist; a ruse of the first magnitude. Also, it is noteworthy that Billingsgate also received the Nobel Prize for successfully mounting a tin of anchovies after they had been canned in olive oil; certainly not a small feat.

Now that the lampshade is in the hands of Dr. Billingsgate, President Trump is confident that justice will be done.

This Story was compiled from sources that have been deemed “More reliable than CNN.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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