QAnon Lid Blown Sky High: John Bolton Hints Of Secret Leader's Identity

Written by Dr. Billingsgate

Sunday, 5 August 2018


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BILLINGSGATE POST: Under intensive questioning by George Staphylococcus, Trump National Security Advisor John Bolton revealed hints that would lead even a casual observer to believe former Secret Service Agent Slim Everdingle is the mysterious head of QAnon.

Some background on Slim: as one of Donald Trump’s personal Secret Service Agents, Slim was the only agent allowed to wear Dickies short-sleeved mechanics coveralls while on duty in the White House. These coveralls have new generation spandex fibers that have a special inter-connectivity which allow a generous fit in the shoulders and chest. Its bi-swing back and elastic waist inserts provide Slim classic comfort and protection while undertaking clandestine operations for QAnon.

While Bolton surreptitiously hinted that Slim is the mysterious, inside leaker of those who wish to bring down the Trump presidency, that only begins to paint the picture of Slim’s clandestine operations. Slim first endeared himself to President Trump by telling him that he would have stepped in front of the two Moscow hookers who allegedly peed on his hotel bed. He was also the agent who discovered that the albino raccoon hairpiece that Vladimir Putin gifted Trump for winning the election was wired. Although he was part of the Secret Service team in Cartagena, Columbia, that was said to have had contacts with prostitutes in 2012 while prepping for President Obama’s visit, Slim was exonerated because, as he explained, he never had physical contact with these floozies, but was merely hovering over them at a discreet distance.

QAnon adherents believe Barack Obama, Hillary, George Soros and their running dogs. John Brennan, James Clapper, James Comey, Robert Mueller and Rod Rosenstein, to name a few, are planning a coup against President Trump while simultaneously being involved,and interactive with, a child sex-trafficking ring. This writer has a hunch that Quasimodo is possibly another conspirator.

QAnon, is loosely described as "an intellectual agency-backed 'psyop' whose action plan is to prevent government intelligence agencies from rounding up people that are otherwise inimical to the goals of the Deep State." Only those with a "Q" Notary Sojac security clearance have access to the eponymously initialed, inter-departmental secrets leaked by Mr. Everdingle through his sub lieutenants.

Since the letter "Q" is the 17th letter of the alphabet, and Donald Trump is our 45th President, the symbolism bears question. 45 less 17 equals 28. Woodrow Wilson was our 28th President. It is claimed that he set in motion the establishment of the Deep State during his tenure. Interestingly, J Edgar Hoover, a Wilson protege, became the first Director of the FBI only three years after Wilson left office. It was Hoover who turned the FBI into an integral part of the Deep State, along with the CIA and the State Department.

Go get those lousy bastards, Slim! You're our only hope.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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