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Funny satire stories about John Bolton

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Funny story: Kim Jong Un invited Bolton into his swimming pool for underwater follies and piranha fish ballet

Kim Jong Un invited Bolton into his swimming pool for underwater follies and piranha fish ballet

Hackers with Orwellophiles-‘R-Us have disclosed important information from the aftermath of the failed meeting between Kim Jong Un and the US back in February, 2019. Corporation media lately have suggested Mr. Kim had removed as many as five impor...

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Funny story: Iran Sends 1,000 Hamburgers To Donald Trump

Iran Sends 1,000 Hamburgers To Donald Trump

To appease President Donald Trump’s warmongering threats directed toward the nation of Iran, (a place Trump has trouble locating on a map) the President of Iran, Hassan Rouhani, is sending 1,000 hamburgers to Washington DC as a gift for the president...

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Funny story: County Joe's 'Fixin' To Die Rag' From Woodstock Rebooted For Our Modern Iran Dilemma

County Joe's 'Fixin' To Die Rag' From Woodstock Rebooted For Our Modern Iran Dilemma

Back in the height of the Vietnam era, a little ditty made it onto the airwaves that protested the undeclared war in a darkly humorous way. It was called “I Feel Like I'm Fixin' To Die Rag” by Country Joe and the Fish, and it became a theme for the w...

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Funny story: Trump sits with hand on phone waiting for call from Iran

Trump sits with hand on phone waiting for call from Iran

In an interview with The Guard Dog at The White House, Mr. Trump said, "All they have to do is call me,” Mr. Trump said. The phone was in his lap at this point. The Guard Dog then asked: “But, sir, there are reports all over mainstream media to...

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Funny story: Bolton and Pompeo with possible new executive positions in the nuclear war shelter business

Bolton and Pompeo with possible new executive positions in the nuclear war shelter business

Insiders are currently whispering that Mr. Bolton and Mr. Pompeo just might be on the chopping block. Washington has been reporting Mr. Trump needed to air out that he was not totally pleased with recent performance. Mr. Bolton may be gone soon...

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Funny story: Trump “tempers” Bolton and Pompeo in special White House ops

Trump “tempers” Bolton and Pompeo in special White House ops

Last week Mr. Trump indicated that at times he must “temper” Mr. Bolton’s enthusiasm for threatening other countries. He stated that “John is a good man," while adding a “but” that, fortunately, at times Mr. Trump needs to control him and calm him...

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Funny story: Trump and Bolton Anxious for Opportunity to Personally Lead Nation's Troops Into War With Iran

Trump and Bolton Anxious for Opportunity to Personally Lead Nation's Troops Into War With Iran

Washington - President Donald Trump and National Security Advisor John Bolton are looking forward to an opportunity to showcase the bravery they unfortunately couldn't exhibit during the Vietnam War, due to circumstances beyond their control, by donn...

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Funny story: Los Tres Cojones Trio at The White House confesses anomaly; US doctors indicate requests for implants now viral

Los Tres Cojones Trio at The White House confesses anomaly; US doctors indicate requests for implants now viral

What has long been the mystery of a male’s having three testicles, instead of two, has suddenly reached new stages of revelation. At this time sweeping Twitter, a startling development has occurred in the Trump administration, hitherto tightly gua...

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Funny story: Kim responds to new Trump negotiations with poem inspired by Robert Frost

Kim responds to new Trump negotiations with poem inspired by Robert Frost

Mr. Trump’s taking over diplomacy with North Korea has brought renewed condemnation from mainstream Democrats and the MSM. At issue is Mr. Kim’s recent reluctance to proceed further with denuclearization, currently assessed by The Washington Post...

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Funny story: The what if you gave a party and nobody came dream haunts Guaido

The what if you gave a party and nobody came dream haunts Guaido

Dark Overbored, specializing in hacking, doorknob analysis, and dream interpretation, has again revealed inside information from the Guaido camp. The dream goes like this: The hall is hired, the bunting and balloons strung, the tables laid wit...

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Funny story: Bolton and Abrams discovered in regime change rituals in dank basement

Bolton and Abrams discovered in regime change rituals in dank basement

The hacker group Dark Overbored has once again released intimate details on those currently governing US policy. This time it's via new technology in “doorknob surveillance,” and a series of “doorknob studies” for "interior scenes." To the fol...

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Funny story: Regime change handbook on Venezuela found in Marco Rubio’s trash by garbage truck sleuths

Regime change handbook on Venezuela found in Marco Rubio’s trash by garbage truck sleuths

Breaking: A new surveillance op is underway in the US via the garbage truck industry (“Streamline Disposal! We’ve Got Your Crap! Inc.”). All trash is now routinely scanned, sniffed, linked, filed, and joined to facial recognition software at a cus...

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Funny story: Hacker leaks Bolton in front of his bathroom mirror addressing himself as “Mr. President”

Hacker leaks Bolton in front of his bathroom mirror addressing himself as “Mr. President”

The hacker group Dark Overbored has come forward with leaks of new details on the Trump presidency. The suspicion that the presidency has secretly changed hands from Mr. Trump to Mr. Bolton is bolstered by these leaks. At issue specifically is...

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Funny story: Trump consulting on who to appoint acting president while he takes a break

Trump consulting on who to appoint acting president while he takes a break

According to Acting Chief of Staff Mick Mulvaney, the list for who will become Acting President (APOTUS) is being carefully studied. Acting Secretary of Defense Patrick Shanahan is also being called in as advisor for the process. Mr. Trump has...

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Funny story: Trump To Pardon Saudi Arabia’s Crown Prince MBS

Trump To Pardon Saudi Arabia’s Crown Prince MBS

White House chief of staff John Kelly and Donald Trump are no longer speaking to one another. It's difficult to evaluate how this can produce a positive outcome toward world peace. Maybe it was for the accumulation of multiple factors or just the...

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Funny story: Bolton to be shot out of a cannon over the Middle East

Bolton to be shot out of a cannon over the Middle East

According to inside analysts, Mr. John Bolton, National Security Advisor, is steadily advancing toward November, 2024. “If there’s one thing we do like it’s a good war,” is commonly expressed by Mr. Bolton and his group at barbecues and gab sessio...

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Funny story: Maduro reaches out to Clinton after assassination attempt

Maduro reaches out to Clinton after assassination attempt

Caracas, Venezuela—Venezuelan President Nicolás “The Madman” Maduro wants to know "what [expletive deleted] happened" a week ago, when explosives-laden drones “went off,” injuring seven soldiers in what appears to have been an attempt on the dickhead...

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