WHITEWASHINGTON, DC/AC - Hillary Clintoon is celebrating the news: forty percent of the respondents to a Phew Poll affirmed that they want to see a woman in the Oval Orifice.
Clintoon (Hillary, not Bill), who may run for president in 2016, beamed at the report. "That's great news."
Hubby Bill agreed. "Now, if we can only get the other sixty percent to vote for you, you may be the first First Lady to become the first president."
"And you may become the first president to become the first lady," she quipped.
"First gentleman, you mean," Bill corrected her.
"You're no gentleman," Clintoon (Hillary, not Bill) told him, "not after what you and that hussy Monica did in the Oval Orifice!"
More Democrats than Republicans are "excited" at the prospect of Clintoon (Hillary, not Bill) occupying the Oval Orifice, possibly because she is a Democrat.
"It's where she belongs," Vice-President Bidet, who asked to remain anonymous, contends.
Sarah Palen rolled her eyes at the news. "Just because a few hairy-legged feminists want a woman in the White House doesn't mean they want that woman there." Palen denied that she has any interest in running. "I'm happy hunting caribou and muskrat," she said.
Asked what he thinks of the idea of a woman in the nation's Executive Mansion, Mitt Rummy said, "I wouldn't mind being over Hillary. She's not half-bad looking when she's out of those pantsuits and wearing extra makeup. Besides, if it didn't work out between us, the whole thing would make a great sitcom."