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Funny satire stories about Computers

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Funny story: Countering the threats posed by artificial intelligence

Countering the threats posed by artificial intelligence

Academics and futurists worldwide are warning of the potential dangers of artificial intelligence (AI), but the tiny East European republic of Szjlobovjia has taken a bold and decisive step towards neutralizing these threats. Beginning in Septembe…

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Funny story: Passwords Are Trapping Civilization

Passwords Are Trapping Civilization

You can’t even order a morning cup of coffee delivered from Peet’s without a password. The password is the missing link between a horrible morning and a, “Thank you, God!” kind of day. And what was that password? Concentrating on a password be…

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Funny story: Computer Says No

Computer Says No

My computer asked me the other day if I was human. And then it gave me a test for me to prove myself human. I took a pen and a piece of paper and scribbled a test for the computer for it to prove to me that it was a computer. It refused to take…

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Funny story: Guy's Sperm to Turn into Tiny Computers - A Computer Dick

Guy's Sperm to Turn into Tiny Computers - A Computer Dick

UBM is working at turning male Sperm into tiny biological Computers. They would roam the body correcting Genetic errors and keep the Penile plumbing in Old Age at optimum running speed. Basically an 80 year old would have the performance capa…

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Funny story: Supercomputers Analyze Billion of Christian Prayers over 2,000 years - No Proof They Work

Supercomputers Analyze Billion of Christian Prayers over 2,000 years - No Proof They Work

Dr. Eisenstein of The American firm - Peta Flop Computing - as a hobby project - had his supercomputers - Alpha and Omega - check all records of people doing Christian prayer - and if any reported their prayer as immediately being done. They coul…

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Funny story: Business Report from Italy - The Mafia Have Programmed Computers to be Mafia

Business Report from Italy - The Mafia Have Programmed Computers to be Mafia

The Instittuto Baloney in Bologna, Italy, just came out with a report that those various branches of the Italian Mafia are using computers and AI to modernize their various evil business operations. A secret recording at a Mafia convention was q…

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Funny story: Biden To Give Chipmakers $52 Billion to Come Back to America - (Don't Be A Stranger)

Biden To Give Chipmakers $52 Billion to Come Back to America - (Don't Be A Stranger)

Corporations are a money-making machine; they have no heart. But the Supreme Court Ruled they have the Rights of a Human Being. So, they fund Politics, and run the Country. If they had a heart, they would stay in the US and provide good jobs t…

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Funny story: British computers will get old-fashioned connections instead of USB C ones, like the Europeans, in a bid to preserve our sovereignty from them wascally wascals in Bwussels

British computers will get old-fashioned connections instead of USB C ones, like the Europeans, in a bid to preserve our sovereignty from them wascally wascals in Bwussels

The British government announced that we won’t be following the EU’s lead in updating new computer equipment to have USB C ports. Hurray! As everyone knows, USB C ports are an evil plot by the anti-British European Parliament to make things ea…

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Funny story: You Don't Own Your Computer, Big Billy Does!

You Don't Own Your Computer, Big Billy Does!

My computer has, once again, shown that I do not own it, but that it owns me. I bought it last week, just a little laptop to do some writing on, no need for apps or games or talking to strangers on the other side of the world. I needed a typewrit…

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Funny story: Man wants Laptop like they have in the films

Man wants Laptop like they have in the films

Man about town Gavin Williamson (not that one) has said that he would like a new laptop, like the ones they have in the films. 'Yes' said Gavin, writing on his blog 'I would like one of those laptops like they always have in the films. One that is…

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Funny story: Computer playing up, just to piss you off

Computer playing up, just to piss you off

Your computer knows all about you. It knows your search history, your innermost soul, and what you think. Sometimes, it doesn't freeze due to performing an illegal action, or because too many tabs are open. Sometimes, it just plays you up to piss…

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Funny story: English Bulldog Owners Catch Their Pet Viewing Doggy Porn

English Bulldog Owners Catch Their Pet Viewing Doggy Porn

LOMPOC, California – (Satire News) – Roy and Deena Nishfitt of Lompoc recently received the shock of their married life. The couple, who have been married for 27 years recently came home from an evening of drinking, dining, and dancing and were sh…

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Funny story: Internet Biscuit Scam Shock

Internet Biscuit Scam Shock

Outraged Welsh biscuit lover Dai Jestif claims big business is stealing millions through internet biscuit scams. “It was only when the computer started malfunctioning that it occurred to me. You see, every time you go to a site it asks you to acc…

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Funny story: Computer very slow only to get on your nerves

Computer very slow only to get on your nerves

Your Computer, Gary is being very slow today, just to get on your nerves. Normally, Mary the mouse and Gary play very nicely together, but today they are both playing you up. 'It is no good' said Gary 'I can't be fast every day you know. I mean…

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Funny story: Scientists Build Elevators With Artificial Intelligence...Unfortunately, There's A Catch

Scientists Build Elevators With Artificial Intelligence...Unfortunately, There's A Catch

Scientists at the United World Scientific And Science Organization have created the world's first elevators, utilizing state-of-the-art Artificial Intelligence programming to create elevators that actually speak to the passengers inside it. Howeve…

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Funny story: The NFL Will Allow Quarterbacks to Use Mini-Computers While They’re on The Playing Field Starting Next Season

The NFL Will Allow Quarterbacks to Use Mini-Computers While They’re on The Playing Field Starting Next Season

NEW YORK – (Sports Satire) – NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell is taking Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones excellent suggestion. Jones suggested to the commissioner that, in order to embrace the ever-improving electronic advances in today’s fast-paced…

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Funny story: First non-binary computer introduced

First non-binary computer introduced

It is the largest milestone in computing since the invention of the internet-enabled fridge. This week, computer manufacturer BigHard has developed the world's first non-binary computer. The computer is called Bernard, but prefers to use the prono…

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