Man Disobeys Lockdown Rules, And Creeps Around Neighbourhood After Dark

Funny story written by Moys Kenwood

Thursday, 9 April 2020

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The government's lockdown rules have been put in place for a very good reason - to stop the spread of the Coronavirus - but one man has admitted that, although he knows this, he disobeys, and steals out of his house during the early hours of each and every morning.

Myke Woodson, 56, watches his television until he can stand no more, then, clad in black, leaves his home and snoops around his neighbourhood in absolute silence.

He tiptoes in and out of gardens, rolls across lawns commando-style, climbs up trees, listens at bedroom windows by 'shinnying' up drainpipes, goes through his neighbours' dustbins, removes notes for the milkman, and scribbles down details of anything interesting, completing dossiers on the local residents after he has finally returned home around dawn.

Twice, he has had to hide, as headlights alerted him to the approach of a police patrol car.

Despite having so far eluded the long arm of the law, police say they are aware of his movements, and are determined to catch him.

But, they say, people should not try to tackle him on their own, but should, instead, ring the police, whereupon they will be given a crime number, and told to go back to bed.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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