Storm Boris sweeps through Europe, causing damage to European Union offices, European Court of Justice and European fishing fleet that was heading to UK waters

Funny story written by Cleopatra Chaos

Thursday, 27 February 2020

image for Storm Boris sweeps through Europe, causing damage to European Union offices, European Court of Justice and European fishing fleet that was heading to UK waters
Stormy weather hits Europe

Severe weather warnings across Europe have been issued, after high winds were spotted spiralling across the English Channel towards the continent. A weather watcher on the cliffs of Dover said he was able to make out a giant face in the swirling air, which appeared to resemble Boris Johnson, Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, with his mouth open, apparently grinning in delight.

Storm “Boris”, as it has now been called, is predicted to cause billions of euros worth of damage to France, Belgium, Germany and other EU countries, though it is anticipated that non-EU countries, such as Albania, Serbia and Turkey will be completely untouched. Damage is expected to not only the fabric of many public buildings, such as the EU offices, the EU Parliament and the European Court of Justice building, but also to the economies of the 27 countries who are still members of the bloc, following the UK’s dramatic departure at the end of January 2020 (known as “Brexit”).

Leading EU figures have sent out differing messages. Michel Barnier, who heads the EU Task Force for Relations with the United Kingdom said that the UK must foot the bill for the damage, since the storm came eastwards across the Channel. Prince Emmanuel Macron of Andorra, who heads up the French Government, demanded that the UK be punished for the calamitous meteorological condition, and insisted that French fishermen should be allowed to fish in British waters. However, current President of the European Union, Ursula von der Leyen, and her former boss, Chancellor Angela Merkel of Germany, said that all parties needed to sit down and talk to each other.

Opposition parties in the United Kingdom, who are opposed to the UK leaving the EU, have demanded that the UK must share in the windy weather affecting Europe and that British buildings must be blown down as well.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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