Stormzy Ruing Choice Of Stage Name After Particularly Inclement Weather Batters UK

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 17 February 2020

image for Stormzy Ruing Choice Of Stage Name After Particularly Inclement Weather Batters UK
Stormzy doesn't want to be associated with tide marks in people's living rooms

British award-winning freestyle rapper, Stormzy, is at a crossroads in his career this morning, after the second major extreme weather incident in two weeks battered the UK into submission under a torrent of rain, high winds and floods, leaving the singer seriously considering whether his stage name oughtn't to be changed.

Born Michael Ebenazer Kwadjo Omari Owuo Jr., in Croydon, south London, Stormzy hit upon the idea of renaming himself when he was at school, and his very long name wouldn't fit on the front of his exercise books.

He chose 'Stormzy', ironically, after adverse weather conditions!

After two huge storms - Storm Ciara and Storm Dennis - unleashed their terrible power over many parts of the country, however, the rapper is reconsidering his choice of moniker.

He said:

"It was a cool name, but after all the rain, gales, landslides and floods over the last fortnight, I worry that people will associate me with the bad weather, and make me unpopularised."

Stormzy is best-known for his WickedSkengman 3 video, in which he utters the immortal phrase:

"stiff chocolato, still take man's girl in ma arsehole"

Or, at least, that's what it sounds like.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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