LGBT+ School To Open In Autumn

Written by Mister Meaner

Saturday, 13 July 2019

image for LGBT+ School To Open In Autumn
Flags aloft at the school this morning

Authorities in Birmingham have announced details of a new ultramodern school facility that will open in the city in September, which will cater specifically, and exclusively for the needs of LGBT+ students.

The school, which has been built at a cost of £40million, will feature the latest in 'advanced thinking', and is an ideological 'high-watermark' to which schools of the future should aspire, according to LGBT+ loudmouths.

Class sizes will be kept to a maximum of ten students; subjects will include Relationships, Sex Education, and Gender Manipulation, as well as Art, Music, Drama, PE, Make-up Application, and Marching.

The school was due to open last term, but last-minute additions to the LGBT roster meant adaptations to toilet facilities became necessary. At the time of writing, there are toilets for homosexual boys, homosexual girls, boys who think they are girls, girls who think they are boys, students who perceive themselves as both, students who feel as if they are neither, transgenders, multigenders, transvestites, attention-seekers, and a facility for those who just haven't made their minds up yet, and who 'need more time to find themselves'.

School uniform will be in the colors of the rainbow.

The end of the world is nigh.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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