DALLAS – (Sports Satire) – The billionaire owner of the Dallas Cowboys has just announced to the sports media that his ‘female’ pride and joy, the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders are going overseas to be goodwill ambassadors.
Dallas owner Jerry Jones, who will soon turn 80, is thrilled that his “Girls” will be strutting their sexy, lascivious stuff on stages throughout communist Russia, communist China, and Buddistic Cambodia.
Jerry, as his wife calls him, stated that he will be paying the entire cheerleading squad $25,000, plus he’ll provide their room and board, and he’ll allow them to each bring back 12 souvenirs.
Jones says that he is thrilled at how well his Dallas Cowboys are playing considering that some players are out with injuries, emotional issues, mental issues, and in the case of [NAME DELETED BY EDITOR] an inverted crotch.
SIDENOTE: Jerry had cautioned the entire cheerleading squad to refrain from getting impregnated while on their goodwill tour.
