BOSTON – (Satire News) – Patrons at a McDonalds, near the Bunker Hill Monument were shocked to see the former president having lunch, and all by himself. An elderly couple that was visiting from Pomona, California, said that they could not believe…
BOSTON – (Satire News) – After years and years, the senators of the Bay State have finally paid attention to the state’s leading gynecologists. With a vote of 71-29, the state’s rulers have passed a bill that will ban all nipple rings. Boston g…
I used to scoff at tradition as a kid but grew to learn over the years, that there is value in certain rituals. They connect us to our past and provide us a way of understanding our world as a continuum. That’s the value some traditions provide. But…
Mark Pettiglio is a good natured, easy-going guy – most of the time that is. His disposition soured after watching Cam Newton play quarterback for his favorite team last season. Mark wasn’t impressed. “He was missing on passes behind the line of…
Scientists from MIT have issued a statement confirming recent rumors that there are trans-dimensional portals in certain areas of the US Northeast. As many have suspected of late, the scientists tell us, fans who enter the Boston Garden/Fleet Center…
Boston, Ma - An 80-year-old man reported complications from his COVID vaccine. Charles Riley found himself unexpectededly unable to walk after being vaccinated. Riley reports that he was so excited about getting the vaccine that "two weeks to the…
BOSTON – (Business Satire) – The New England Seafood Industry is panicking due to the fact that, for some unknown reason, Atlantic coast lobsters have all stopped mating. Hans Figgarello, a noted lobster expert, stated that he believes the reason…
BOSTON – (Satire News) - Kamala Harris was in Boston to drum up support for the new Biden-Harris Democratic presidential ticket. She made it a point, as she does whenever she's in Boston, to have a clam chowder dinner. Kamala was asked by a rep…
BOSTON – (Music Satire) - The female rapper that Snoop Dogg and Drake have both called the sexiest black rappin’ gal in the US of A was taken into custody at The Mrs. Paul Revere Convention Center. A reporter for Afro Sheen Magazine, stated that j…
In more a medical miracle than an instance of evangelical fervor, South Boston became the (double-)birthplace of the nation’s first ever born-again baby, Robbie Fitzpatrick. While doctors are still struggling to pin down the scientific details. t...
Beantown, U. S. A. In an obvious parody of a long-running radio commercial for a private, religious-oriented university, Oliveti Navy Bean Inc., the nation's largest distributor of that specialty product, released a new radio commercial today, voice...
Boston, MA - A Boston woman who illegally parked in a clearly marked "tow zone" demanded a pedicure from a meter maid. The meter maid explained that "tow zone" does not mean a place where pedicures are given, but instead means a place where your...
BOSTON, Mass. - Remember that horrible Boston winter that had a blizzard effect all over the cable news networks? Well it's still around. It's not snowing on the East Coast now that Memorial Day has come and gone, but the remnants of last winter stan...
BILLINGSGATE POST: With snow reaching heights of 6 or more feet in the Boston area, reports of a creepy man dressed as a snowman are being investigated by Boston Police. One lady, who did not want to be identified, reported that she was steppi...
Boston-Families throughout New England yesterday defiantly posted "Je Suis Frostie" signs in their windows and on the snowmen in their front and back yards, following an anti-snowman fatwah issued by a Saudi Arabian imam, Sheikh Mohammed Saleh al-Mun...
BOSTON - One of the oldest organizations in the greater Boston area has just announced that they are cancelling their next monthly meeting. The vice-president of The East Coast Tantrum Throwing Society Tilford P. Pristbottle stated that the commit...
BEAN TOWN, MA -- Boston public schools have suspended the distribution of condoms-well some condoms. Specifically, officials will no longer provide, upon request, any condom that is packaged in a wrapper that encourage users to "hump one," advertises...
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