DAYTONA BEACH, Florida – (Sports Satire) – Officials for the National Association of Stock Car Racing, revealed to the sports media that ex-president Donald J. Trump wanted 10 free tickets, so he and his family could attend the upcoming Pensacola 300 Race.
The NASCAR board of directors took a vote, and it came out 9 to 1, to ban the new citizen of Mar-a-Lago from all future NASCAR races, because racing fans hate liars more than they hate Thanksgiving etiquette.
Board member, Eunice V. Millabrew, who has just gotten off probation, for hen rustling, said she spoke for the 8 other nay voters, who want the disgraced sexual pervert to not even get within two miles of any NASCAR race track.
Member Rufus Gigglerock, who is a life long Republican and has the biggest ping pong ball collection in Florida, went further and said that if he even smells a Trump in the vicinity, he will personally call the sheriff and have them all evicted and fined $14,000.
Most NASCAR fans who live in trailers, now literally hate Trump and his lying band of arrogant, conceited, privileged pieces of crocodile shit children; especially Don Jr. aka "Dopey."
Buckaroo Kazoo with The Turnstile Review, stated that Trump demands to know why he and his family are being discriminated against; especially since they're, white, privileged, and rich-as-shit.
He was told that there are 18 reasons, but the main one is because they are all just totally fucked up beyond fixing.
Sports Territory Magazine reported that popular race car driver Tucky "Bubba" Dippdoddle, remarked that he heard that the guys in the white frock coats, are out looking for Donald, Donald Jr, and Eric Trump, so that they can escort the three shitheads to the nearest funny farm.