ATLANTA - (Sports Satire) - The sexiest and prettiest NASCAR driver Danica Patrick, told Skin Flix Illustrated Magazine writer Hank Bangbocker, that lately she has been so bored she's been watching rerurns of weather on the Weather Channel. The ho…
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - NASCAR princess Danica Patrick recently sat down with Fajita San Guacamole with Hollywood Innuendo at The Intoxicated Iguana Bar in New York City. The two have known each other ever since Danica was in high school…
GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Sports Satire) - According to Sports Territory Magazine, Aaron Rodgers is as happy as a wolf at a sheep convention. The Green Bay QB, told STM's Tango Brisket, that after months and months of pleading with his ex-girlfriend…
GREEN BAY – (Sports Satire) – It is no secret that ever since she was dumped by her Green Bay Packers boyfriend, Danica (Patrick) has been pining about her quarterback. Danica has told close friends that AR has the most amazing cock that she has e…
CHEESE OMELETTE, Wisconsin – (Satire News) – The greatest female NASCAR driver of all time, has just admitted that she still pines for her ex-boyfriend Aaron Rodgers. Danica Sue Patrick, recently spoke with reporter Savannah Stiletto with The Dail…
LAREDO, Texas – (Sports Satire) – Sports Bet Gazette reporter Zorro La Bamba, has just commented that a NASCAR driver has been suspended and fined $200,000 for a serious racing infraction. Ford driver Homer Finwater, who drove the Peter Pan Peanut…
TOLEDO, Ohio – (Sports Satire) – The NASCAR organization is proud to announce that the Toledo 300 Invitational was won by the organization’s very first transgender driver. Twenty-eight-year-old Catalina Puffinpick captured the coveted race from a…
GORGONZOLA CREEK, Wisconsin – (Sports News) – Sports Territory Magazine has just broken the scoop that the racing darling of NASCAR has decided to get back into the world of auto racing. Danica Patrick, who is the ex-girlfriend of Green Bay Packer…
DAYTONA BEACH, Florida – (Sports Satire) – NASCAR was founded in 1948, and now after 73 years, the National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing is proudly boasting that they are finally getting with the racing program. Sports Territory Magazine…
DAYTONA BEACH, Florida – (Sports Satire) – NASCAR officials are red faced after racing authority inspectors found that one of the drivers was found to have a quantity of marijuana stashed underneath the driver’s seat of his race car. Inspectors ch…
DAYTONA BEACH, Florida – (Sports Satire) – Officials for the National Association of Stock Car Racing, revealed to the sports media that ex-president Donald J. Trump wanted 10 free tickets, so he and his family could attend the upcoming Pensacola 300…
PASCAGOULA, Mississippi – (Sports Satire) – Ever since March, when the Coronavirus first got out of hand, NASCAR’s attendance has fallen by 61%. And then the fact that the racing entity banned Confederate flags really kicked the racing giant in it…
VENUS FLYTRAP, North Carolina – (Sports Satire) – Two weeks ago NASCAR driver Smokey “Bubba” Butterhouse was suspended from racing in the Crackerhead Saltine Crackers 200 Auto Race in Georgia. Butterhouse refused to paint over the likeness of Pres…
CRACKERHEAD, Georgia – (Sports Satire) – The Sports Bet Gazette has just announced that NASCAR driver Smokey “Bubba” Butterhouse has just been suspended, and will not drive in next week’s 87th Annual Crackerhead Saltine Crackers 200 Auto Race. An…
DAYTONA BEACH, Florida – (Sports Satire) - Officials at NASCAR have suspended another race car driver after several policy violations. Racer Mike Wallace, no relation to black NASCAR driver Bubba Wallace, was notified that he has been suspended du…
DAYTONA BEACH, Florida – (Sports Satire) - One of the greatest NASCAR auto racers of all time, Richard Petty, has just told Bubba Wallace that he wants him to stay put in the #43 race car. Wallace’s contract is due to expire soon, and Petty wants…
GREEN BAY, Wisconsin – After dating for 2 years and 3 days, and buying a $28 million mansion together, Aaron and Danica will now ‘run and drive’ off into the sunset. An unidentified neighbor said that they looked so happy. Lots of times he would s…
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