Sir Elton John: I have been victim of bullying
It could have been the glasses Reg.
Or the syrup.
Or the name.
Just putting it out there.
Woolworths to reopen and sell petrol.
Robbie Williams to be a dad!
Take That! See - he doesn't bat for the other side...
BBC axe Total Wipeout
Total Wipeout Wiped Out!
George Galloway pelted with eggs in Bradford.
The protester would have thrown petrol but he'd queued over two hours for it and didn't want to waste it...
Labour MPs call for Francis Maude to resign
For having a silly name.
Imogen Thomas tweets pic of boobs for National Cleavage Day
Twitter users celebrate National Cleavage Day.
Well it would be rude not to.
Diego Maradona confronts rival fans in UAE
"Oi - you nicked my drugs?"
Mystic Meg FA Cup predictions:
The FA Cup will be won by a team from London! Or Merseyside..
Wearing Red.. Or White.. Or Blue..
Francis Maude has advised punters to take jerry cans full of money down to their local betting shops.
UEFA ban Arsene Wenger from touchline for 3 matches...
After his outburst at referee in AC Milan second leg.In unrelated news, Arsenal have just purchased a brand new linen basket which they are planning on keeping in the dug out area...
24 hour strikes by public workers in Spain...
Actually, it was 22 hours. They still stopped for a midday siesta.
Panic Buying at the petrol pumps!
On the plus side, a sales increase of 172% (diesel) has officially pulled Britain out of recession! Go Team Uk!
Who said Politicians don't know what they're talking about?
Rare, Medium or well done Sir?
Wackjob Mary Porterhouse announces 26 point plan to 'save UK high streets, which equals squat! Put money in peoples pockets and they will spend, generate business and problem solved you silly old cow!
written by Herrdoktorfox, 30 March 2012
Panic Buying As Tesco Announce Possible Future Croissant Shortage
'I don't even like croissants,' said a typical shopper, who had queued for hours, 'but, if there's to be a shortage, I have to buy as many packs as possible, now.'
written by Swan Morrison, 30 March 2012
David Cameron Crisis Latest:
All future Cash for access dinners postponed. Not because of £250,000 fee required but because no one has any petrol to get to Downing St. Emergency pies go on sale at (South) West Leeds Station...
1 Litre of fuel for sale
Will swap for 3 first class stamps
written by ExiledRoyal, 30 March 2012
King Kong turns into a non-vegetarian, human population unsupportive.
Hollywood's pet gorilla has decided to switch to a non-vegetarian diet plan. Green leaves and fruits will be replaced by human heads and limbs, although his marijuana intake will remain unaffected.
written by Aakash, 30 March 2012
Inseine's BOOK OF THE DAY 5
written by IN SEINE, 30 March 2012
George Galloway wins Bradford West by-election for Respect!
Respect candidate takes seat from Labour with 10,140 majority, claiming 'the most sensational victory in British political history'
Robber accidentally dialled 911 from his cellphone while stealing!
He was stealing about 700 pounds of scrap metals.
Police say the 46-year-old man was arrested after the robbery from a Southington merchant.
Kitten hitches hair-raising ride over Golden Gate!
A stowaway kitten is safe despite taking an 85-mile ride in a van's engine compartment that included a trip across California's Golden Gate Bridge!
Cat survives 19-story plunge from Boston high rise
Sugar, the cat had no broken bones or cuts, just some bruising on her lungs after the fall from a window!
"Purrhaps she should be renamed Lucky!
Surfer Survives Bite After Falling On To Shark
The bull shark, bit Billy O'Leary twice, slicing his flesh down to the bone and severely damaging his Achilles tendon.
Mr O'Leary, 20, got to shore, he was bandaged.
Biden mis-speaks (again)
Today VP Biden referred to Iowa Scott Community College President Dr. Theresa Paper as "Dr. Pepper." When told that he called her the wrong name, he said "my apologies to Mrs. Pibb."
written by waterman, 30 March 2012