DUCK PECKER, Michigan - (Science and Technology Satire) - Watchdog Now News reports that an extremely powerful lightning bolt struck Lake Crankshaft, and it immediately caught on fire.
A local resident asked how in the world a lake can catch on fire just from having a lightning bolt strike it.
The answer according to the extremely intelligent Watchdog Now News reporter Dylan Fresco is actually quite easy.
Fresco, who was once married to French Mustard heiress Gloria Gushingwell, remarked that the lake is extremely polluted with all kinds of debris such as paper drinking cups, Big Mac boxes, Swiss dancing wooden clogs, used condoms, and chopsticks, that when the bolt hit it, it caught the entire lake on fire quicker than it takes a spider to masturbate. ■
