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Funny satire stories about Heatwave

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UK Reacts To Break In Hot Weather

Funny story: UK Reacts To Break In Hot Weather

The UK was today left reeling after a brief spell of cooler weather. Children were seen staring at the skies in wonder as spots of warm rain fell for the first time in months. One school has planned a weeks' lessons round "warm clothing". Teacher,...

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Heatwave in Amsterdam brings 'Gays' in their 'Gay Parade' to boiling point!

Funny story: Heatwave in Amsterdam brings 'Gays' in their 'Gay Parade' to boiling point!

It seems that the incredible European heatwave has more consequences than hot, sweaty bodies, people escaping to waterholes, burnt grass, forest fires, lack of booze, tarmac melting, OAPs dropping dead, and our world is nearing an apocalyptic end, NO...

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Man with Machete Holds Up Ice Cream Van

Funny story: Man with Machete Holds Up Ice Cream Van

Desperate measures are being taken, it seems, in the recent heatwave, as a Merseyside man held up an ice cream van with a machete. The Liverpudlian desparado claims he had been passed by no less than four vans in his quest for a 99 for himself and...

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Heatwave Puts UK Children at Risk

Funny story: Heatwave Puts UK Children at Risk

The current unrelenting humid, sticky, overly-moist heatwave that is sweeping the UK, is putting the nation's children at risk, says a new survey, out today. The survey, commissioned by "Overprotective Parents UK", states that more and more child...

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Man To Sue Government Over 'Knackered Lawn'

Funny story: Man To Sue Government Over 'Knackered Lawn'

The UK heatwave which has been heating and waving for three weeks now, has 'knackered' a man's lawn in Shropshire, it has been alleged. The man, Les Jonno, says that the unseasonal 'red-hot' temperatures have put paid to decades of diligent, deter...

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Grass The Driest It's Been For 42 Years!

Funny story: Grass The Driest It's Been For 42 Years!

The heatwave that has been literally 'heating' the United Kingdom at the moment is having a devastating effect on plantlife, and the country's grass is the driest it's been since 1976, or, as it's become known in some circles, the Summer of the Ladyb...

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UK Wildlife Sanctuaries Inundated in Heatwave

Funny story: UK Wildlife Sanctuaries Inundated in Heatwave

Wildlife Sanctuaries across the UK are feeling the effects of the heatwave, with many more animals than usual crossing their thresholds every day. One Sanctuary ,"Debbies Donkeys" in Wales said that every morning seagulls are queueing by the door...

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Men realises waistcoats aren't the way to go in a heatwave

Funny story: Men realises waistcoats aren't the way to go in a heatwave

Tony Hemmings, 33, the cock of the walk in Basingstoke has realised that despite Gareth Southgate's leading work in the field, waist-coats are not the defacto male clothing to be worn during a heat-wave. 'Imagine my surprise, to be following the s...

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Heatwave Causes Mass Delusions

Funny story: Heatwave Causes Mass Delusions

For those of us basking in the recent heatwave taking care with the sun cream, there are others who are not being so careful and are risking serious heatstroke. The NHS has reported a massive increase in people who believe that England have just w...

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Heatwave Causes Nudity Problems In Suburban UK

Funny story: Heatwave Causes Nudity Problems In Suburban UK

The continuing heatwave which has seen temperatures across the UK rise to same levels as other countries across the world, has brought with it an influx of complaints. Apart from the usual "it's too bloody hot" whingers, the general public is comp...

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Woman in England Denied Ice Cream In Heatwave

Funny story: Woman in England Denied Ice Cream In Heatwave

A woman was today denied an ice cream by a seriously fat vendor in an ice cream van outside a school. The woman had had a particularly long, hot, difficult day at work had just been thinking that if there was an ice cream van parked outside the sc...

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Global warming hits UK with impunity

Funny story: Global warming hits UK with impunity

Thousands of UK residents have been locked outside due to the unusual high temperatures in February caused by El Nino the "beast from the west!" Retailers all over the country are struggling to provide boiling-hot customers with shorts, flip-flops, a...

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Phoenix, Arizona, is so hot even rattlesnakes need airco!

Funny story: Phoenix, Arizona, is so hot even rattlesnakes need airco!

A heatwave hitting Phoenix, Arizona is causing several problems and not only to humans! Jaggedone and his CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army; very appropriate here), is on a chilling-down trip escaping from Brexit lunacy in the US. As soon as he lan...

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Heatwave creates innovative methods in how to get some kip!

Funny story: Heatwave creates innovative methods in how to get some kip!

The heatwave affecting most of Europe has caused many people to create methods of getting some sleep. In fact, such situations sometimes bring out the very best in people (and sadly sometimes the worst!). Here are Jaggedone's methods for UK suffer...

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The Sun V the Sun

Funny story: The Sun V the Sun

As Britain resides in the grip of a paralysis due to a foreign invader (the sun) Back and to the Left news decided to get some insight into this deadly heat wave. We spoke to Sun journalist Farr Right to try and gauge the nation's feelings on these,...

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Local Women Blames Bad Date on Meal at Spicy Indian Restaurant

Funny story: Local Women Blames Bad Date on Meal at Spicy Indian Restaurant

Gladys Hornswagger of Morristown, Tennessee blames her ruined date with 'that hot nerd' Griffin Gaskey, on their date at the new Taj Palace Plus Restaurant in nearby Knoxville. The proprietors told the couple that their food was authentic Indian b...

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Viagra ban for Prince Philip

Funny story: Viagra ban for Prince Philip

Windsor - "Bloody country's going to the dogs if a bloke can't have his little blue pills," a wrecked isle dysfunction specialist at the Palace said today as searing temperatures continued to cook Prince Philip's giblets. The nonagenarian curmudge...

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...In the good old summertime!

Funny story: ...In the good old summertime!

After better part of 20 months living in semi-darkness with household lights necessary during supposed daylight hours the UK is suddenly basking in what the weather clowns refer to as a 'heatwave'. For the average Pom the term 'heatwave' refers to...

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Breaking news…

Sales blames ring for illness

Boston Red Sox baseball player "Lefty" Sales said his cock ring made him sick. "It turned my penis green," he said. "My girlfriend paid for gold, but obviously, the jeweler sold her brass."
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