WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – RumorLand News is reporting that President Trump is now saying that the reason for his landslide loss to Joe Biden is due to space aliens.
The sad, aging man who is turning into a zombie, before our very eyes, insists that aliens influenced the election.
When he was asked how the hell he came to that conclusion, he replied that a total of 9 "spacies", as Trump calls them, used advertising banners attached to their spaceships, saying “Vote For Joe Biden – Don’t Vote For Donald Trump”.
Trump was asked what proof he had. He said that he'd heard one of his all-time favorite people, Tucker Carlson, say it on his Fox News Show, which, he pointed out, is ranked number one in the entire world.
The President, who is going downhill faster than Sarah Huckabee-Sanders chasing down a rolling donut, noted that, in all the time he has known Tucky, he has never known him to lie, cheat on his wife, disparage Democrats, or claim that doing heroin is bad for you.
The out-going president is now saying that he is going to talk to the Supreme Court justices, and insist that they re-do the election, so that he can steal it.
DJT caught himself, and noted that he meant to say, so that he can win the election fair and square, with no backs.