Sarah Ferguson, "The Duchess of York" Confesses That She Now Regrets Not Having Worn Socks During Her 1992 Tryst With John Bryan
LONDON - Sarah Margaret Ferguson recently stated to a reporter for The Tickety Boo News that in her 51 years she has probably had more ups and downs that the American stock market. The Marylebone, London native spoke candidly with Neville Twickenb...
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Susan Boyle has offered Queen Elizabeth a special gown for the wedding
Susan Boyle has offered Queen Elizabeth a special gown to wear at Wills's and Kate's April wedding. Susan has kindly offered the Queen the gold dress SHE wore at her April '09 BGT audition. She said that it brought her luck and thinks it would be ideal for Queen Elizabeth and, more importantly, it will save the country a few quid. Naturally the famous dress has been dry-cleaned and is hangi...
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On Eve of Kate Middleton's Wedding to Prince William: Most Brits Admit They Still Wank off To Henry Tudor
In a quick survey of British citizenry 65% admitted that they still fantasize about Henry Tudor while masturbating. Kate Middleton came in a distant second at 12% followed by the late George III, also known as "Mad" King George. The survey reporte...
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The Curse of Princess Diana's Engagement Ring
A close friend of Diana, Princess of Wales has tonight revealed that Diana knew her engagement ring was cursed but never had time to tell her family before she died. She was told of the curse by an Indian man she met in a midnight bizarre in Ista...
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Some royal bridesmaids dubbed pug-ugly freaks
London - "You shouldn't call them freaks," protocol watchers seethed with ire as little Grace Van Cutsem and Lady Louise Windsor performed in public today. Yet it's hard to find kind words to describe some of the inbreds at today's royal gravy tra...
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Commemorative Weeding Mugs
Chinese firm Goodong Enterprises has anticipated a Royal upheaval. They have produced mugs commemorating the forthcoming marriage of Kate & William, but - perhaps knowing something we don't know - they have pictured Prince Harry with Kate Middlet...
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Dimbleby Snubbed Over Royal Wedding
Princess Eugenie Tits Gaffe In Royal Wedding Coverage
Prince William's secret marriage plans revealed
Prince William has invited Charlie Sheen to his Bachelor Night
Noddy Holder Criticises Prince William's Wedding Socks
Pippa Middleton Upset Stories About Her Vagina Not Dominating "The Spoof!"
Kate Middleton to sign draconian Palace prenup
Charles invites General Pinochet money laundering banker to nuptial freakshow
Prince William Marries Katie Holmes By Mistake
Kate will promise to obey - for a big chunk of the Civil List
'Trashy' Zara in fake tan riddle
Other Horses Embarrassed by Lead Horse in Royal Wedding Procession

Wedding Undress? or: How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love The Royal Wedding
As the big day draws near speculation is reaching fever pitch and only one question is on the countries lips: What will Megan wear on the big day? Many experts and commentators have thrown their speculation around like jizz at an orgy and a pleth...
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Pakistan offers Royal couple use of recently vacated honeymoon hideway
The delayed honeymoon of newlyweds the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge may now go ahead immediately after the Pakistani government offered use of a recently vacated high security compound guaranteed to suppress the Royal couples location for an extensi...
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Queen Elizabeth - Slave Driver - Gordon Ramsay comments
Queen Elizabeth is - it appears - a Royal slave driver. Apparently she will NOT be giving staff at the 'Palaces' the day off on William and Kate's Wedding Day. Naturally, they are all pretty upset, which is putting in mildly. No wonder she is hav...
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Weather-Related Petitionary Prayer Could Cause Environmental Catastrophes, Warn Scientists
Controversy surrounding weather management for the recent British Royal Wedding has reignited debate about the effect of petitionary prayer on global weather systems. London's weather forecast for the Royal Wedding day had been poor. Unofficial Pa...
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Isle of Wight News - Newby villagers will not be watching Royal Wedding on the telly
Residents of Newby, Isle of Wight are NOT going to be watching the Royal Wedding on t.v. When asked "Why not?", Mrs. Irma Hoar, of Cheating Crescent, Newby, answered, "Well, for crying out loud, the world didn't 'stand still' when me and our lad got married 32 years back. It's only a bloody wedding for Christ sake. Folk get married every bloody day. What difference will THIS wedding make...
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Surrey City Man Looking Forward to Sex with Social Climbing Actuary/Wife in 2013
London based futures trader Martin Susspeck is planning to short his own wife's investment in the future successor to Queen Catherine Middleton. "Daft cow has it in her head if she times the next pup proper, the kid can marry William and Kitty's f...
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Tots R Us planning to produce and sell miniature Royal Wedding Dresses
Tots R Us are planning to produce and sell many thousands of Kate Middleton's wedding dress, in miniature sizes, as soon as it is SEEN in public. The idea is to market them as Christening Gowns. Even parents interviewed, who were not planning on having their children christened, are beginning to change their minds just so that they can dress up their little ones as mini-Kates. The world will...
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Entertainment Laid On for the Royal Wedding
Prior to their departure for a two-week honeymoon in Blackpool the royal couple Prince Willam and Kate and guests will be entertained by some of the world's top perforrmers during their wedding banquet. On the list are: Satan; who will give a rendition of "God Save the Queen" on the didgeridoo, his favourite instrument. Bono and U2, blasting out some of their biggest hits including the...
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Phil The Greek Restores Noble Right Of Prima Nocta
In what is likely to be seen as a highly controversial move, HRH Prince Philip has taken it upon himself to restore the ancient noble's right of Prima Nocta. This is the right which allows a senior royal to have sexual rights to the wife of a newly m...
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Trump Tries to Wrangle Invitation to Princess Eugenie's Wedding
President Donald Trump of the U.S. has announced that he would like to visit London on October 12, which just happens to be the planned date for Princess Eugenie of York's wedding. Included in the unsolicited invitation for the Trumps to visit was...
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Royal Wedding Photographers Prepare For Nip Slips, Wardrobe Malfunctions
Photographers at the Royal Wedding will be prepared for all things: bad weather, poor lighting, distance shots, etc. They are also, however, preparing for events not generally anticipated, like nip slips and wardrobe malfunctions. Coveted press pos...
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Royal Wedding Allows Man to Be Patriotic for One Day
LONDON & WALSALL - As the wedding between Dian--- Kate and Will goes on, one man is relishing the fact that he can be a patriot today. "Usually," said Mark Smith, "I have to keep my national pride under wraps you see. Sometimes people see that...
Read full storyFunny Royal Wedding Headlines
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The Curse of Princess Diana's Engagement Ring
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Surrey City Man Looking Forward to Sex with Social Climbing Actuary/Wife in 2013
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Sarah Ferguson, "The Duchess of York" Confesses That She Now Regrets Not Having Worn Socks During Her 1992 Tryst With John Bryan
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Commemorative Weeding Mugs
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Royal Wedding Photographers Prepare For Nip Slips, Wardrobe Malfunctions
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Entertainment Laid On for the Royal Wedding
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Royal Wedding Allows Man to Be Patriotic for One Day
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Pakistan offers Royal couple use of recently vacated honeymoon hideway
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Weather-Related Petitionary Prayer Could Cause Environmental Catastrophes, Warn Scientists
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Trump Tries to Wrangle Invitation to Princess Eugenie's Wedding
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Phil The Greek Restores Noble Right Of Prima Nocta
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Queen Elizabeth - Slave Driver - Gordon Ramsay comments
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Susan Boyle has offered Queen Elizabeth a special gown for the wedding
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Isle of Wight News - Newby villagers will not be watching Royal Wedding on the telly
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Tots R Us planning to produce and sell miniature Royal Wedding Dresses
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Kate Middleton: I'm no virgin.
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On Eve of Kate Middleton's Wedding to Prince William: Most Brits Admit They Still Wank off To Henry Tudor
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Some royal bridesmaids dubbed pug-ugly freaks
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Pope Fights Back
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Wedding Undress? or: How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love The Royal Wedding