ANNAPOLIS, Maryland - (Satire News) - The woman who Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump trusted more than even one of his own sons Eric, was the disheveled fake blonde Kellyanne Conway.
The 55-year-old Kellyanne, told Tucker "The Creep" Carlson that one of her main duties was to every day at lunch time sneak eight Big Macs into the White House.
She noted that Donald made her promise not to tell Melania because she used to say that he ate so many Big Macs that he was starting to look like a fooking Beeg Mac.
Kellyanne, amazingly is still married to George Conway, who is considered to be the man who hates the racist, pussy-grabber (Trump) more than anyone else in the entire nation; including Hilary Clinton, Jeff Sessions, Bill Barr, Michael Cohen, and gay rapper Black Kitty Meow Meow.
SIDENOTE: Kellyanne is presently unemployed but has reportedly applied to be a receptionist for a female gynecologist.
