LONDON – (Satire News) – Buckingham Palace is reporting that a plan by the Taliban to kidnap Piers Morgan has been stopped by England’s crack Scotland Yard.
Tickety Boo News reporter Neville Twickenbuck, spoke with Queen Elizabeth, who was so shook up she did not realize she had only shaved one leg.
He asked her how she was feeling. She grinned and said that one of her ovaries, the left one, was hurting like hell.
Twicky, as he is known in the UK, asked if she had taken some Pepto Bismol.
QE-2 replied that she had actually ingested two full bottles, but the pain had not subsided, and in fact it had moved over to her xphoid process.
She then told Morganoochi, as she has called Piers since 1991, that Millard, the employee that makes her afternoon tea, told her that, she should really make an appointment to see a gynecologist before the pain spreads down to her you-know-what.
Her majestic majesty giggled, tugged at her right eyebrow, and replied that she hasn’t had any feelings in her nether regions since the summer of 1987.
Meanwhile, Scotland Yard is reporting that two Taliban terrorists have been arrested, their lap tops, their watches, and their camels have been confiscated, and they are waiting in London’s Petula Clark Prison to be extradited to Iceland.